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Question
Posted by: Gobsmacked | 2008/07/01

My boyfriend wants a baby!

Ok so this may not sound like any thing out of the norm in today's society but I need some input here!
My boyfriend and I have known each other for 10 years and have been dating for 8 months.

He's gonna be a great dad and we're madly in love and committed to each other. I just want your opinion on this whole "not married, lets have a baby thing" Im very old school and believe this should be done step by step once financially stable etc.

No one has ever said this to me, no man i've ever dated has been this serious and it actually makes my legs weak hearing him say, stop taking your pill. Im getting broody now, and Im thinking "maybe i should just do this" someone talk some sense into me!!!!!

Im 26 and he's 32.

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

If you've been going together for 10 years, this is no time to suddenly get impulsive ! Think it through, and then discuss it careflly and at length with him. Having a baby is a lifelong committment, not something to be leapt into suddenly if he feels perhaps transiently broody

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Our users say:
Posted by: Carla | 2008/07/02

If you bf is willing to commit to having a baby with you, which means that a baby will bind him you for ever, why is he not willing to commit to you as well? If he wants a baby for life, but he does not want you for life, you will surely run into problems that many other people on this site have with ex's that do not support their kids or do not spend time with them.

Get married first.

Reply to Carla
Posted by: Linda | 2008/07/02

I'm in exactly the same situation and I'm SO excited. How would one be sure that you are ready?

Reply to Linda
Posted by: GVOR | 2008/07/01

Having a baby is a HUGE step and the effects of it is hardly as simple and flippant as your reaction to his request. If not well thought through and planned, a baby can break even the strongest relationship and there's no way you can bring a child into this world because the request made you "weak at the knees."

If youve been together for ten years I dont see why he cant do it the good ol' fashioned way and ask for your hand in marriage, get married and start trying for the baby on the wedding night. Dont let your brain be clouded by the romantic sound of the request, think straight and be practical then see if your answer is still the same. Ask relevant question like where the money will come from for the monthly gynae vivts,the scans,the baby clothes,the delivery,the monthly daycare or daymother fees,the food and nappies and wetwipes, theres so many issues to consider, a baby can change people if they are not absolutely sure what they aregetting into

Reply to GVOR
Posted by: micky | 2008/07/01

ek glo ook nog aan trou voor kinders en ek het dit in die volgorde gedoen ek dink nie mens is ooit geldlik gereed vir n baba nie maar hul vra nie veel nie en bring hope liefde maak net seker hul is gereed vir grood verandringe nie sleg maar n baba kan jou hele lewe deurmekaar krap.

Reply to micky

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