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Question
Posted by: Guru | 2012-03-29

Mustarbation

Can i please be advised what is the cause of masterbating and how to stop it, because i have a girlfriend and we do have sex but i just can''t stop doing it i mustarbate more often than having sex with my girl friend. And does it cause early ejaculation cause i have early ejaculation and does not give me interest in sex these days, i just last about 5 minutes.

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageSexologist

People assume that this would be related to sexual desire, but very often masturbation is used to manage emotions - to soothe anxiety, to deal with boredom, etc. Sometimes people masturbate because they have an erection and believe that this is what they must do - this is not the case. I'd encourage you to think about the possible reasons why you masturbate as frequently as you do. Of course you can actually stop it, but perhaps you feel strong urges to masturbate and give in to those strong urges (this feels like you can't stop). It sounds like it might even be starting to be a problem for your relationship so I'd encourage you to try to stop for a period of time...see what comes up for you (strong emotions, perhaps you realise you can ignore the urges/erections). If you continue to struggle, then I recommend you have an assessment with a sexual health professional familiar with compulsive sexual behaviour. If you require assistance locating such a professional you can send an email to helpline.sasha@gmail.com and we can try to assist.

Claire - SASHA

The information provided does not constitute a diagnosis of your condition. You should consult a medical practitioner or other appropriate health care professional for a physical exmanication, diagnosis and formal advice. Health24 and the expert accept no responsibility or liability for any damage or personal harm you may suffer resulting from making use of this content.

3
Our users say:
Posted by: Muhammad | 2012-03-29

Try doing something like ycling to take your mind off things.

Reply to Muhammad
Posted by: jack | 2012-03-29

do you play sport, because if you are tired of sport you wont mastrubate so much, get your mind of sex .

Reply to jack
Posted by: Sexologist | 2012-03-29

People assume that this would be related to sexual desire, but very often masturbation is used to manage emotions - to soothe anxiety, to deal with boredom, etc. Sometimes people masturbate because they have an erection and believe that this is what they must do - this is not the case. I'd encourage you to think about the possible reasons why you masturbate as frequently as you do. Of course you can actually stop it, but perhaps you feel strong urges to masturbate and give in to those strong urges (this feels like you can't stop). It sounds like it might even be starting to be a problem for your relationship so I'd encourage you to try to stop for a period of time...see what comes up for you (strong emotions, perhaps you realise you can ignore the urges/erections). If you continue to struggle, then I recommend you have an assessment with a sexual health professional familiar with compulsive sexual behaviour. If you require assistance locating such a professional you can send an email to helpline.sasha@gmail.com and we can try to assist.

Claire - SASHA

Reply to Sexologist

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