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Question
Posted by: Frustrated | 2011/03/23

Moving on

I met this guy last year and we got on very well. Our visits with each other were limited as we did not live in the same town. If I have to say it I really developed strong feelings for this guy. After a while he become distant and the contact also stopped but he contniues to surf singles websites. Eventually, he admitted to me that he was going to reconcile with his second wife who had asked him whether they could try again even though they had been apart for about 4 years and were married for about 8 years they divorced as she decided to return to the father of her children, at their request. The children have now finished their schooling and she now wants to return to him and try again. Also in short he refuses to discuss anything with me and at one point I asked him whether I had done something to offend him and his answer was an emphatic NO. Therefore my question is how do I get this guy out of my thoughts even although he has made such an impact on my life after meeting him and spending time with him?

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

It sounds as though he had much less of a relationship with you than you had with him, and care very much less about the relationship than you did. The cause for the separation seems to lie mainly or entirely within hi. Yes, you do need to move on, and a counsellor may be able to help you to do this more efficiently. Much of the problem may lie not in your adjusting to the loss of much that you actually had, but in giving up on the loss of what you had hoped for, imagined, and thought you had

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Our users say:
Posted by: Gogo | 2011/03/23

I know its difficult, i think the so called your boyfriend was living a double life. He was not being honest with u. No man can do that thing he has been staying with that women. How stranded is he if he has to take that women back. I really doubt it.

Reply to Gogo
Posted by: cybershrink | 2011/03/23

It sounds as though he had much less of a relationship with you than you had with him, and care very much less about the relationship than you did. The cause for the separation seems to lie mainly or entirely within hi. Yes, you do need to move on, and a counsellor may be able to help you to do this more efficiently. Much of the problem may lie not in your adjusting to the loss of much that you actually had, but in giving up on the loss of what you had hoped for, imagined, and thought you had

Reply to cybershrink

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