Our expert says:
Loss of a pet is a very real cause of grief, and 2-4 months is still early in the process of grief work, even if some of her reactions sound somewhat extreme. That she can see something humorous in the situation recently suggests a bit of progress.
Normal grief takes 9 months or more, and while in the first month or so most people accept the grief, after that they find it upsetting to themselves and wish we would get over it, long before we are ready to do so, or even able to do so.
Be cautious about a replacement animal - sometimes they are valuable WHEN the individual wants it ( which may be never, or later ) ; and not as an automatic response. I like the idea of an older needy animal if she becomes interested in this. It can never be a replacement, but may be an agreeable new companion. And cats may indeed be worth considering - they can be very affectionate and less physically demanding.
And Obvious - thanks for the "oldies" line !!! Accurate, though !
Patricia makes some excellent points, too. Especially about talking about the dog, and sharing happy memories, rather than letting her concentrate solely on the loss.
In your later comments, it's implid that the dog didn't die of natural causes, but had to be "put down" due to the insensitive rules after moving her home - if so, that's in many ways worse, as there's far more room to feel guilty, as the death had to be decided and deliberate rather than accidental or natural. In the jar, she has found a form of pet that can still be comforting without breaking the rules. And as eia says, one should consider this like aby other bereavement - thus far going normally, but counselling may become appropriate if the degree of nisery gets worse, or fails to progress in a few more months.
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