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Question
Posted by: Joe | 2011-02-09

Mother in law

Mother in law does not really care for me but every now and then pretends to do. Most of the time she only talks to my wife and not really to me when we visit her.
Things have been okay for the last 3 years or so but now she is back to her old self in being rude to my wife(her daughter) and I don''t care for it.Now I have grown to ignore her sarcastic comments but it still upsets my wife.

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

Hav you discussed this with your wife ? Maybe the pair of you should agree to calmly tell the woman that until she can be pleasant and supportive, neither of you plan to visit her, as she makes the experience too unpleasant. There is not reason either of you should feel you have to put up with her rudeness and unkindness

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Our users say:
Posted by: Chanelle | 2011-02-10

My mother in law is the same, when I tell my hubby she is being a bit offish with me, then he asks her and she says no she is not angry with me, as if I am the one causing trouble....But she got caught, one of his family members told us that she speaks bad about me to them!!!! LOL only now he can see.

I told him that is his mother but I dont need to be part of her...he can, but he knows nothing can break us up! because he knows her now...

Reply to Chanelle
Posted by: Purple | 2011-02-10

Perhaps you and your wife need to invite her to your house, explain to her that if she can''t treat you both like adults and behave like an adult and be pleasant that you will no longer have contact with her.

Remind her that the ball is in her court on this one, and she needs to do some thinking and decide whether her need to be rude is more important than remaining in contact with the family.

You will either find the relationship improves or ends completely - either way, a positive outcome.

Reply to Purple
Posted by: cybershrink | 2011-02-10

Hav you discussed this with your wife ? Maybe the pair of you should agree to calmly tell the woman that until she can be pleasant and supportive, neither of you plan to visit her, as she makes the experience too unpleasant. There is not reason either of you should feel you have to put up with her rudeness and unkindness

Reply to cybershrink

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