Our expert says:
One of the problems with your own financial policy ( the old "eat, drink, and be merry, for tomorrow we die" ) is that it might work only if you were sure to die tomorrow. But suppose you wake up ALIVE ? Suppose you life to 60, to 80 ? How then would you live ? And the way the world economy is going, you can't assume anyone else will be prepared to pay for you if you use up all of your earnings.
I think this may be especially a risk for folks who grew up really poor. Wither one becomes a miser, scared to spend ANYTHING for you don't feel secure that the money will keep on arriving ( we were por before, I don't want to become poor again ); or you become wasteful, feeling the world owes it to you to make up for the earlier poverty, so you spend, spend spend.
Maybe a couples counsellor could help you two to negotiate a midway path here. It doesn't feel fair if after 10 years, say, in which you've both been earning well, she has bought the house, the car, the furniture, and all that is still there ; and you paid for the parties, and of course there's nothing left from them except headaches and liver damage.
A counsellor could help, as I say, negotiate a reasonable middle road, with all essentials guaranteed, savings building up well, and yet not unrelieved gloom, so time and money for a reasonable amount of fun, too.
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