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Question
Posted by: miserable | 2008/08/25

MiSERABLE /INSECURE

Dear Dr
Please hep me I reccently had a baby she is 4 months old I am so insecure always arguing with my hubby he was married before and told me all the things he used to do to his ex wife he says because he did not love her before the baby we seperated I begged him to come back and told him i would change In Oct 2003 I was pregnant and had an abortion I did not tell anyone and I use this to make him feel guilty and sorry for me i told him i will change my insecurities and we decided to get back together we then had the baby now we fighting all the time But he recently told me he is only with me because of the chidl and that he will leave when shes bigger I live miserable day in and out he told me he made a mistake coming back i should have let him go that time
But my point is if he really did not want to be with me he had a mind of his own
now i feel used
he says he still loves me when things are ok
but when we fight he tells me that i should have let him go that time BUT THEN when w make up he says he said those things becuase i of the bad things I tell him that he is a loser and hopeless
what can I do becuase i am so insecure
I dont want him to have friends
but i pretend as if its fine jsut to keep the peace but its killing me inside
I have to be someone else just to keep him there
I can not go on like this
I need to get myself back i was vberant and self condifent
now i think i am ugly and have love self esteem
is my marriage worth saving

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Our expert says:
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You sound like a couple who have been in urgent need of marriage counselling for years, both reacting unhelpfully to each other and to your problems. Persuade him to join you in marriage counselling as soon as you can, to sort out whatever can be sorted out.

The information provided does not constitute a diagnosis of your condition. You should consult a medical practitioner or other appropriate health care professional for a physical exmanication, diagnosis and formal advice. Health24 and the expert accept no responsibility or liability for any damage or personal harm you may suffer resulting from making use of this content.

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