Posted by: Sally - AGAIN | 2009-03-19

Men' s Opinions Please


Please see my previous Post No. 530.
Here' s the senario... this morning I wake up feeling quite frisky, so I initiate a QUICKIE only to be turned down...
The excuse is that we should save it for another time...
Is this normal? Please advise... I am feeling so unwanted! I just don' t know what to do anymore.

What can I do?
PS Leaving him is not an option. I love sex, but I definately love him more!

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Our expert says:
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I sounds like you really need to up the ante in your discussions with him. Be sensitive the fact that he could be struggling with feelings of sexual inadequacy and therefore avoiding sex...he needs to know that you love him and care about him more than this problem, but that if he cares about your feelings, then he will care enough to try to get assistance with it.

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Our users say:
Posted by: Frustrated | 2009-03-20

hi Striker
Yes i did try to spice it up, i have a drawer full of really sexy underwear, i bought chocolate body paint, i sugested doing it in the car. He finds fault with everything. So that means that i only ever have sex in bed in the bedroom in one position and even then its because i jumped him. He just has no desire for sex, he doesnt even think about it. My son sleeps over with my parents once a week so he cant really use him as an excuse. In a good month we will have sex 4 times a month. Once i got tired of always being the one to initiate it so i didnt and he didnt touch me for 2 months. Any more advise, please?

Reply to Frustrated
Posted by: Striker | 2009-03-20

Frustrated, did u try and soice things up? Like buying nyc underwear. And remember to make a special time for sex. With kids around it becomes difficult. When my kids were small our sexlife almost died. There were just not time for it. The kids were always around and the only time we had sex were when they were not around. And that happened seldom. I am unfortunately one of the guys that dont do quickies. I like to be alone with my wife with enough time.

Reply to Striker
Posted by: frustrated | 2009-03-19

Hi Sally, i am a married woman been married for 6 years and have a 3 year old son. My husband has no libido. Sex is just not important to him, so i feel like a freak for wanting it. I have been growing resentfull of him and although i love him i am now considering getting a divorce. I dont want to just go have sex with some other man but i also dont want to spend the next 6 years of my life always being the one to innitiate sex and even if he doesnt say no and he does it it feels like its a job for him. Its not fun, just something he has to do. Before getting married i never thought that sex was such an issue, but believe me it really is. My advise is to sort it out before you get married. Love is great, but im staring to learn that sometimes its just not enough and sometimes you loose respect for the man you love because you look at him and think "  will you just be a man and jump me already" ?

Reply to frustrated
Posted by: XXX | 2009-03-19

I have tried for 30 days in a row to get my wife to have sex and all without success.Tried again last night and this morning but the arm was conveniently moved acroos her breasts to ensure I cannot touch them and any movement towards the lower area was swifly handed off.
What is it with these partners that play this game ! I really don' t want to leave my wife but WTF I am only human and sex is a big part of my life.(or should be).Now I know why men and women go for f*ck buddies.

Reply to XXX
Posted by: starlight | 2009-03-19

Hi Sally
He is not intrested.........proberbly he has some one else you need to carefully consider other options to ease you pain and desires ........yu cannot sacrfice your please go to a professional for help. can we chat privately so that I can help with your emotional stress .

Willing to help


Reply to starlight

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