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Question
Posted by: Nikki | 2010/03/01

ME &  MY BIG MOUTH!

My brother-in-law and his wife came to our house yesterday as we were leaving to go to a kiddies birthday party. His wife walked into the house without greeting and had a really snotty attitude about her! She was miserable and kept making snotty comments about everything. She did not greet either me or my husband when she arrived! At one stage my young showed her a t-shirt he had bought with his pocket money and her comment was " i am really not interested in seeing it thank you" . At the time I just ignored her comment. This morning however I got really annoyed when I thought about it - it was totally unnecessary and uncalled for! I asked her husband what was wrong with her and it ended up in a huge fight ... now I think I should''ve kept my mouth shut, but I have done so for too long and yesterday''s incident was the last straw! I told them that I was tired of being treated so badly in my own home and now they make it sound like I was at fault as they said I hugged and kissed them " half-heartedly"  when we left for our outing. How pathetic and childish ... I know I should not react the way I do sometimes, but when it comes to my child, I get really annoyed when someone is nasty to him. He is a very soft-natured little boy and gets upset when someone is mean to him. Must I apologise for getting annoyed with her shoddy treatment of my family in our own home or just leave them to cool down?? In-laws & mdash - whoever said it was easy???

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

Its very understandable that you asked ( being needlessly unkind to a kid is unjustifiable, whatever other problems she might have in her life ) - maybe it epends on HOW you asked ? Maybe the pair of them had just had a blazing row, and your question reminded him of that ?
Leave them to cool down - it doesn't wound as though you have anything to apologise for.
The incident reminds me of the little boy who was asked at school for a definition of "relations", and said "They're people who come to dinner at home, but aren't friends of yours".

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4
Our users say:
Posted by: Maine | 2010/03/02

I wish I had a big mouth!

Well done to you for saying something!

There is always going on in my family and I often just keep my mouth shut to ''keep the peace'' but in the meantime I and other are getting hurt but what some ppl in the family say and do.

I say - YOU GO GIRL!

Reply to Maine
Posted by: K | 2010/03/01

I don''t think you were overeacting at all, sht i would loose it rightaway with mty kid, softspoken / kind or rude, nobody disrespect my kid in his home.....you know your situation makes my blood boil.......compared to me you are bloody kind, lord knows they both would have left rightaway& mdash & mdash & mdash ag sis

Reply to K
Posted by: Sam | 2010/03/01

You need to tackle these things as they happen. If the woman comes in with out saying so much as hello, look her in the eye and say, " Oh hello to you too!"  and when she told your son that she wasn''t interested, then you should have told her to please have a look, because he is just trying to show off. That way, you have gotten right to the problem, and the only person that looks nasty, is her!

Reply to Sam
Posted by: cybershrink | 2010/03/01

Its very understandable that you asked ( being needlessly unkind to a kid is unjustifiable, whatever other problems she might have in her life ) - maybe it epends on HOW you asked ? Maybe the pair of them had just had a blazing row, and your question reminded him of that ?
Leave them to cool down - it doesn't wound as though you have anything to apologise for.
The incident reminds me of the little boy who was asked at school for a definition of "relations", and said "They're people who come to dinner at home, but aren't friends of yours".

Reply to cybershrink

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