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Question
Posted by: Brad | 2011/01/07

May be gay but have a problem with it

I am certainly attracted to men and not to women women and have often felt I am gay, but there is one huge issue holding me back from accpeting this. I am more than slightly put off (to put it mildly) by the concept of anal sex and I just cannot get my head around that. I''d like to hear your comments and how others have managed to overcome this. I am 32 and keen to get on with my life but I feel trapped because I''m not straight but also uncomfortable with the anal sex thing.

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageGay, lesbian and bisexual expert

Hi Brad and thanks for posting.

It is a myth that all gay men engage in anal sex. Anal sex is not associated with having a gay identity, a fact that many straight people who enjoy anal sex can attest to. I don't think your aversion to anal sex should be holding you back from exploring your sexual identity, meeting people and possibly establishing a relationship.

You're a gay man who isn't into anal sex. There's no problem in that.

The information provided does not constitute a diagnosis of your condition. You should consult a medical practitioner or other appropriate health care professional for a physical exmanication, diagnosis and formal advice. Health24 and the expert accept no responsibility or liability for any damage or personal harm you may suffer resulting from making use of this content.

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Our users say:
Posted by: LONEWOLF | 2011/01/10

Agree with SAM. Give it a try, but do not force the issue. Get all the correct advice on what to do and not to. Once you get used to it, and preferably with the right partner, there is no turning back. Also forget about the top and bottom issue. I had issues with being the bottom party, now I just love it

All the best.

Reply to LONEWOLF
Posted by: Sam | 2011/01/10

Anal sex is not mandatory regardless of your sexuality. Yes, it is highly fetishized as part of gay sex life since time immemorial, but you make the decisions concerning your own sex life. If you don't like (the thought) of it, just don't go there! So what's the prob?

ps. I couldn't at first understand why gay men would want to simulate straight -|- ing myself (not to mention the discomfort), but with lots of slow practice (I wanted to see what the hype was about), I now love it!

Reply to Sam
Posted by: LONEWOLF | 2011/01/10

Hi Brad. I think the Expert will assist with your question. Please igonore the Ignoramus Hano.

Reply to LONEWOLF
Posted by: gay, lesbian and bisexual expert | 2011/01/10

Hi Brad and thanks for posting.

It is a myth that all gay men engage in anal sex. Anal sex is not associated with having a gay identity, a fact that many straight people who enjoy anal sex can attest to. I don't think your aversion to anal sex should be holding you back from exploring your sexual identity, meeting people and possibly establishing a relationship.

You're a gay man who isn't into anal sex. There's no problem in that.

Reply to gay, lesbian and bisexual expert

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