Our expert says:
Masturbation both by men and women whilst they are involved in a sexual relationship is a normal occurrence. Masturbation forms part of your personal relationship with yourself. You said that your husband "prefers" to masturbate. I assume you mean that he prefers to masturbate rather than have sex with you. If this is true then I would suggest that the two of you have an open and honest discussion about this and if it is the case I would recommend seeing a sex therapist.
It is not uncommon that women and men have emotional responses to discovering that their partner masturbates. The problem often is not the masturbation, but a lack of proper sexual health education where we are given a thorough education about normal human sexual behaviour. Partners then make assumptions that their partner masturbates for reasons such as that they are "not good enough as a sexual partner" etc.
It is very common that two individuals in a sexual relationship do not have the exact same sexual appetite and sexual rhythm and this is where masturbation often also occurrs normally.
What is important is open honest sexual communication and proper sexual education.
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