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Question
Posted by: Babe | 2009/01/28

Marriage proposal postponed/cancelled?

Two years (November) ago my bf proposed marriage to me and his family was supposed to meet mine for lobol negotiations. Suddenly he was quiet and we carried on with the relationship as if nothing happend. He started again two months ago (November) with the same story and now he is quiet again, how can i deal with this issue cos its really frustrating me. NB we are both middle aged and divorced.

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Our expert says:
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Isnt it important to discuss this frankly and calmly with him ? YOu shouldn't be left guessing as to whatever is going on. It might not even be about you --- is it possible there are problems in his family about affording lobola, or senior family members just not wanting him to marry again ?

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Our users say:
Posted by: Babe | 2009/01/29

Thanks for the advice, will speak to him.

Reply to Babe
Posted by: My opinion | 2009/01/28

I really don' t think you will be pushing him - you will be calmly asking what was the hold up after last November. IT WAS A VERY LONG TIME. I mean - proposing marriage is saying let' s get married and there is no harm in asking when exactly.

Reply to My opinion
Posted by: Babe | 2009/01/28

Thanks for the response. No theres no problem about the lobola or his family not wanting him to marry again infact they are happy that he wants to marry , but it seems he is the one who is scared and im scared to confront him because he may think im pushing him.

Reply to Babe

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