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Question
Posted by: Cikizwa | 2010/03/23

Marriage problem

I got married in December we are staying in our house with my husbands daughter and his brothers daughter. Ever since we stayed together things have never been the same. The kids are very funny on me and the father whenever I tell him he thinks I am funny but I have decided to just keep quiet and just not say anything. The other thing that I dont like about my situation is something that happens last week my husband has a tendency of not telling me anything he discussed his things either with his daughters or his sisters I only see by actions that something has been discussed and then I ask him it is then that I will get answers. Last week on Friday he just said kids will be collected the next day by his sister not and then I said ok. I thought it was just something for that week and yet it is something that has been arranged for the rest of the year, and next week they will go to his sister for good, is this fair, or must I just keep quiet, today I told him that he does not treat me like his wife so I will do as he does.

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

It does sound as though he is paying too much attention to his family, sisters and other relatives, than to you, and maybe hasn't really thought out how a wife should be respected and how she should fit into his family system. Obviously he should have discussed these comings and goings with you - am I understanding correctly, though, has he made arrangements for the kids to spend the rest of the year with some other family member, leaving you and he alone together ? That might be a sensible move for the sake of your relationship, though clearly one that should have been discussed with you.
Doing as he does only makes matters worse, though

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Our users say:
Posted by: cybershrink | 2010/03/23

It does sound as though he is paying too much attention to his family, sisters and other relatives, than to you, and maybe hasn't really thought out how a wife should be respected and how she should fit into his family system. Obviously he should have discussed these comings and goings with you - am I understanding correctly, though, has he made arrangements for the kids to spend the rest of the year with some other family member, leaving you and he alone together ? That might be a sensible move for the sake of your relationship, though clearly one that should have been discussed with you.
Doing as he does only makes matters worse, though

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