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Question
Posted by: jinx | 2008/06/19

marriage in trouble

i have been married for 16 years. All was well until 8 years ago, when mother in law came to stay with us. Our sex life was great until then. My husband works in an industry that is fast paced, and has staff that work for him. There is one woman, who tells everybody that my husband and I don't sleep together anymore. WHich is true.... but I certainly did not tell her. The way that she carries on, its as if she is having an affair with my husband. She is by no means a Naomi Campbell, but I don;t think my husband would go for her. My husband gets very defensive and protects her every single time..... I have a problem with that.... please help

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

marriage counselling ?

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Our users say:
Posted by: jinx | 2008/06/23

Confronted him and what I got was a guilt trip. He burst into tears, not admitting to anything, and packed his bags and went and stayed at afriend. Came back the next day, and we have not spoken to each other, we chat politely......
Cybershrink advised counselling - am afraid that he does not believe in that.... Do I ask him if we can talk about the confrontation or do I just keep quiet.....????

Reply to jinx
Posted by: jinx | 2008/06/20

Thanks for the answers. I am confronting him tonight, as I have had enough..... by the way she looks like a beggar! She is an alcoholic and has the bergies joining her.... I believe that she does witchcraft or goes to someone to do spells....I am one of those wives, whose always let him go out with the boys, did not hassle him, I was /am too good for him. There was never nothing that he lacked in this marriage.

Reply to jinx
Posted by: T | 2008/06/19

i totally agree with gvor and candi. where there's smoke... there's fire. how the hell does this woman get to know the intimate details of your marriage!?! i might sound like a cow now. but seriously... he cant possibly use his mother as an excuse for getting it on with a co-worker. his mother moving in has nothing to do with it! its his decision to mess around, his mom didnt tell him to do it

Reply to T
Posted by: Gentle Voice Of Reason (GVOR) | 2008/06/19

Like Candi says, the fact that he is defending her says a lot. If a woman becomes everything to a man that he is not finding in his problematic marriage, he might just be tempted to allow it to go to an affair, even if she is no Naomi Campbell, so dont fool yourself. Rather start doing something to salvage your marriage, gofor counseling, re-ignite your sex life, do whatever it takes to save your marriage

Reply to Gentle Voice Of Reason (GVOR)
Posted by: Candi | 2008/06/19

Just by the fact that he defends her should tell you there is something wrong... regardless of what she looks like, it is the attention she pays to him that strokes his ego... and office romances/sex is more common that you realise. Its got to do with the forbidden fruit.. You need to have an open discussion with him about your concerns and suggest a counsellor to help you get thru your problems. Is there no way mother-in-law can be moved into a place of her own so that you have your privacy again??

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