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Question
Posted by: mmm | 2008/09/19

Marriage

I' m 22 female and lately so many girls that were in high school with me got married straight out of school or are getting married in a couple of month' s time. Why do they get married so young. It' s good that theyve found that special one. It' s just my perception but I could never see myself getting married even in 2 years time. They must be very mature but too me they are so so young still. Would really like to know why they get married so soon. Is it because they feel they are doing the right thing. This is what you need to do. Is it for religious purposes. The fact that they are married now they can enjoy sex with each other. What about experiencing more of life that settling down with one person. There' s still so much I want to do with myself.

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Our expert says:
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Does it really need to matter to you why or whether others get married ( some hapilly, some miserably ) Other perfectly normal and sensible people get married later in life, and may be even happier, which having achieved other goals in the meantime. Enjoy the other opportunities that appeal to you --- marriage can be on your agenda, but maybe not top of the list at this particular time

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Our users say:
Posted by: love it | 2008/09/23

I have been married for 8 years now and i' m 28 years have 2 kids the oldest is 6 and youngest 6 months and i am loving every moment of it. My husband was 26 years when we get married and i was 20 yrs.I was studying at that time and till today i dont regret it.

Reply to love it
Posted by: Pissed off | 2008/09/22

I agree ozzy you are 100% correct, the thing is its not about getting married early its about you as an individual &  what you decide to do you shouldnt sterotype people &  say most 22 year olds are immature or doesnt have what it takes to have a good marriage its either you single &  lonely &  jealous that you not engaged or you just think you too perfect. Im a 25 year old woman unmarried but I have been engaged for 2 years to a great 22 year old guy we waiting for our home to be built in order to get married and I believe your morals,maturity, values commitments &  beliefs is what marriage should be based on not age

Reply to Pissed off
Posted by: mmmm | 2008/09/22

Ozzy who you pointing fingers at here? Just a simple question. Jealous of????

Reply to mmmm
Posted by: Ozzy | 2008/09/19

Sounds to me like you' re just jealous - otherwise you' d be living your so-called ' wonderful'  life without worrying what other people do.

Sad and pathetic methinks.

Reply to Ozzy
Posted by: Maria | 2008/09/19

EL, I know you' re hurting really badly right now, but that doesn' t mean you can generalise your experiences and assume that it will happen to everybody.

Mmm... Well done for not falling for the hype around marriage. Deciding to bind yourself closely with someone, theoretically for life, is not a decision to be taken lightly. I think very few people are mature enough at 22 to make that decision and stick with it. At that age you are going to grow and develop so much still, and so will your partner. Chances are you might grow in different directions and then it doesn' t work out. When you' re a bit older and you' ve sorted out who you are and what you want out of life, you stand a better chance of choosing a partner that you can stay with and be happy.

Having said that, some people can get married at 22 and live a long happy life together. And others can wait another 10 years and still end up unhappy in their marriages. The key thing is to communicate with your partner, make sure you share the same goals and values and that you can deal with conflict in a way that brings you closer together rather than tear you apart.

Reply to Maria
Posted by: EL | 2008/09/19

I think no one should get married! There' s too many people that go through divorce, it hurts everyone, it' s a waste of money etc.!

Reply to EL
Posted by: koos | 2008/09/19

well ...look at the devorce stats... and its freightning,in a years time 60% of them will be devorced!

Reply to koos
Posted by: mmmm | 2008/09/19

Nope it does not bother me at all. Just my curiosity sometimes.

I do find it' s more the build up, the excitement, all the attention and the dress.

Reply to mmmm
Posted by: Lara | 2008/09/19

Its actually all about the dress.... in the circle of life after leaving school marriage should follow... unfortunately far too many young girls follow this instead of first experiencing the world. Also there is all the excitement and build up towards getting engaged then the wedding with all its pomp and ceremony... and not much thought is actually given to what is going to happen for the rest of their lives or if they really know the person they are getting married to. The fact that they can now enjoy sex together because they are married is nonsense.... there are no rules that say you cannot have sex before you are married.... at any rate.... the sex gets less when you are married!!! This is just my opinion.

Reply to Lara

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