Posted by: Depressed | 2013-01-21

Marital Issues

I am married for a year and a half. Both husband and I were married before and he has a son from previous marriage and I don''t have any children. We dated for 11 months before we married. He was the perfect boyfriend. But after marriage he has changed drastically. He spoils his son a lot and as a result his son is very demanding and speaks disrespectfully to his dad and grandmother. Son is very manipulative and when I speak to my husband about it he gets very upset. We are living in in laws outbuilding at present and we have lots of issues regarding this as mother in law, always takes things from my kitchen without permission, there are always visitors on weekends and we do not have any privacy. he gets very upset when i tell him how i feel. he one day admitted that it is his way or no way. he is also very manipluative. We always fighting cos he does not give me much attention, everything is about his son, he will go out of his way for his son but will not bother about me. His son comes to us everyday after school and goes to his mum in the evening and every weekend he is with us. I just feel this is too much to handle.

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Our expert says:
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He needs to learn how to be a perfect father, more than a good boyfriend, and to learn that spoiling a child in this way is actually abusive. Kids will be manipulative if they are allowed and encouraged to be so. Sounds like he is not treating you with enough respect, so his son does likewise, and so does his mother.
Anyone who believes that in a relationship everything must be his way or no way, doesn't deserve to be in a relationship and isn't fit for one. Its not at all surprising he isn't still married to his first wife ; apparently he didn't want a second wife, but a cheaper servant, childminder, and general assistant. Maybe you should use the same lawyer as his first wife did ?

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