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Question
Posted by: Jules | 2009-02-16

Male impotence and its affect on a woman

My husband has been taking prescription Beater blockers for two years along with other prescription medication. He is now completely impotent. We avoid talking about the issue and it has become a ' pink elephant'  in the room that we are ignoring. I feel that I have to suppress my own sexual feelings (I am 42 and am very interested in sex at the moment). I have 2 related questions to ask.

Do women have a fertility surge in their 40' s - is this why I am so interested in sex at the moment?

I seem to have lost my appetite for food - can a lack of sex and suppressed sexual feelings cause this?

Thank you so much

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageSexologist

It is known that Women tend to reach their sexual peak from 35 years and up – research shows that it is often due to the fact that women do not have to stress about falling pregnant anymore, are feeling more comfortable with their bodies and themselves as individual beings with the right to stand up for what it is that you want in life. Often this is also the time in women’s lives where they do not have to stress abut the needs of children anymore. Your interest in sex is thus a “normal” phenomenon.

It is interesting that you are losing your appetite for food – as sex is often food for the sexual desire and has a close bond with emotional comforting, as food has it could have a strong relation – symbolically you are starving your body as your sexual desire is being starved. Depressive type of emotions could also result in a loss of appetite.

By the sound of what you are saying you are not in an emotional good place. I would strongly recommend that you and preferably your husband should seek the professional assistance of a psychologist/sexologist that specifically work in the field of sexual concerns to assist you through this challenging times.

A website that could be helpful is www.sexualhealth.co.za. You are welcome to phone the SASHA Helpline – 0860 100 262; and a facilitator will be able to assist you in finding a practitioner as close as possible to you.

The information provided does not constitute a diagnosis of your condition. You should consult a medical practitioner or other appropriate health care professional for a physical exmanication, diagnosis and formal advice. Health24 and the expert accept no responsibility or liability for any damage or personal harm you may suffer resulting from making use of this content.

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