Posted by: mom2boys | 2008-11-13


What is expected behavior for a 5 yr old? Yesterday my son played with a toy that I know is not his....When I asked about it he said that we baught it at P' nPay....well I can' t remember this! I tried to stay calm and said that maybe some boy at school has put it in my sons bag? I usually unpack his bag and never saw this toy. He said that it was in his cupboard....still, I can' t remember it. So we took the toy to school today, he asked every one if the toy belongs to some one, the one boy said he has one, but he thinks it' s at home. I gave it to the teacher to keep....I also spoke a little about the positives regarding being honest and that the owner of the toy might be missing his toy....exct.....I tried to stay positive and not preaching. My son also sometimes lies to stay out of trouble or to look ' smart'  (like ' bragging' )....I don' t know if I should punnish my son for this behavior, because I want him to feel safe in telling me the truth, but I also want him to understand that stealing and lying is unexceptable.

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Our expert says:
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Maybe its just me, but I don't understand your message. You've found a toy he says he;s had for a long time and which you dotn't remember. He could be lying or telling the truth. You embarrassed him by taking the toy to school and questioning the whole class, and only one child THOUGHT he had one like it, but has not reported it as stolen.
It seems that the "behaviour" is still unclear, and its hard to punish him without certainty. Try the parenting forum, and let's see what other readers suggest here

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Our users say:
Posted by: Sad Mommy | 2008-11-13

We in the same boat with my daughter and NO ONE believes me :(

Reply to Sad Mommy
Posted by: Wit' s end | 2008-11-13

I' ve got a son 10 years of age - We' ve taken him to phsycologist, psychiatrist and " arbeidsterapeute"  for assistance but no luck - When he goes for the treatments he would be the " perfec"  son and they will find nothing wrong - He stole over R3000.00 in the last year where he admitted guilt from the school (photo money, tour money, kids pocket money etc.) He stole a lot of money out of our wallets in the past year - he dodges the alarm to steel from the kitchen at night - he lies with a straight face, manupulates and cries a lot to make you feel sorry for him - next day he will steal and lie again. We tried with the school to assist in searching his bag every morning and afternoon when he goes home but he stopped going to the principal' s office. He is too young to go to Boys Town - we have no clue what to do here - HELP !!!!

Reply to Wit&#39 s end

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