Our expert says:
There are a number of reasons for low libido, including being depressed, side effect of medication, high stress levels, and so on. Libido often reduces naturally for many women a while after a relationship has become stable, and this is due to natural changes in body chemistry and requires careful management/negotiation by the couple. I'm not sure which is relevant in your case, but you could discuss this with your GP or gynae to just check out what physical factors could be relevant. In the absence of any physical causes, it may be worth exploring psychological factors including comfort with being sexual, previous sexual trauma, fears about desiring sex or letting go. As for ideas to improve it, that pretty much depends on the cause. Although what we know is that if you enhance your arousability (exercising the pelvic floor, use of lubricant to heighten stimulation, use of fantasy if needed/appropriate) can LEAD to desire when already being sexual. Other than that, the best that science can offer you if there is no obvious physical cause, is to exercise your 'choice' to be sexual despite not having the urge...
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