Our expert says:
You start wherever you are, and proceed, with patience, to work through the terribly hard task of repairing your life. The more one builds one's life around the oresence and participation of a loved one, the harder it isto re-adjust. If the death was the responsibility of someone else, it is natural to feel anger, and one should not blame oneself for such a normal reaction.
Start to focus on recognizing your task of re-forming a constructive life without him, as something he surely would have wanted you to do, and seeing such a strong life as a tribute to him, and a suitable, living memorial.
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