Our expert says:
I know eactly what this is like, Dee. I was faced with a similar situation when my late mother, following a stroke and head injury, developed dementia, and became increasiongly dependent, having always been a fiercely and brilliantly independent woman. It is difficult, and hard to do ; and however much you do, you will always wish you had somehow done more. But not to do all you can would be even worse to face. See a p[ersonal counsellor to help maintain your own strength. Have a chat to your local Hospice, as they or maybe some other visiting nurses might be able to care for her for short periods of time, even at home, and let you have even a few days of respite.
Cancer is an awful illness to deal with, but at a certain stage it can become fairly predictable and steadily downhill. Dementia is much less predictable and, because the person is unable to be helpful, more difficult. And Ulcerative Colitis is very difficult in its own way, with its pattern of worsening and improvement and worsening again. Maybe if yopur mom would see a counsellor, she could be helped to handle the situation a bit better, and if she was emotionally more at peace, could not only co-operate better with treatment, but also less emotional turmoil could result in some improvement of the condition itself
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