Posted by: Liza | 2011-01-18


So my kids were with their dad for Christmas(Pretoria) before coming to visit me for a few days too(Cape Town).

The day after my 14 year old came back from his visit, he was extremely subdued. The next day he came to me in tears because he wants to go back and live with his dad. He even wrote up a list of pro''s and con''s to help him make the decision. Unfortunately there were many cons on my side of the list. I don''t own a car. I don''t get a maid twice a week. He doesn''t have any friends here in Cape Town - he has lots of friends in Pretoria. The school I sent him to here in Cape Town is mostly black. His school in Pretoria is mostly white. I''ve tried so hard to try and shave his racist corners off, but his father is an old-school racist who still believes that a ''boy'' should call him ''baas''.

Since xhusband has legal custody, I couldn''t say much. I did tell my son that if it''s better for him to stay with his dad, then he should stay with his dad because I only want what''s best for him. I didn''t want to make him feel guilty for his choice, so I kept a straight, happy face when he boarded the plane last week.

Since then though, I''ve devolved into a lonely depressed blob. Sitting at work today, but all I want to do is cry. Right now I can''t even commit suicide, because my son will blame himself and I can''t do that to him.

Sheesh - I was fine until I saw my psychiatrist last Wednesday. He broke down some walls I created to protect myself. No walls means I actually have to work through the difficult emotions that were hiding behind the walls. And right now it''s just too much.

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

Answered the other time this was posted

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Our users say:
Posted by: Liza | 2011-01-20

Any white person who refers to a black person as a ''-|-'' is a racist in my book. Being a rascist also means that the rascist feels he is superior just because of skin colour. It''s illogical yet thrives in the minds of those who go through life with blinkers on. Blame apartheid? Us whites did go through all the ''whites are superior'' propaganda during apartheid. Some people however cannot tell the difference between propaganda and truth.

Reply to Liza
Posted by: awb | 2011-01-20

always someone is a racist, just because i don''t mix with blacks now i''m a racist or your ex is a racist, please i assume you will also now blame apartheid, now that your son lives with his dad.

geeez when will this shit stop

Reply to awb
Posted by: ? | 2011-01-18

Who gave legal custody to a racist?

Reply to ?
Posted by: cybershrink | 2011-01-18

Answered the other time this was posted

Reply to cybershrink

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