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Question
Posted by: Bug | 2008/06/05

living with an alcoholic

Iam trying to help my hubby with his drik problem, but he says he does not have one, he has admitted in the last year he has a problem, we did try to get help, but he stopped. I have found that when Iam around him he does not drink so much, but when iam away its as if there is no end. I truly love him & want to help, but he is driving me crazy with the drinking. We always have out busts about his drinking. Iam depressed, he does not see it. He fails to see what he is doing to himself, let alone me. I really need help, i do not know where to turn anymore. We have tried AA, our church priest & other people who have experience with alcoholic. I constantly have a headache & pain in my shoulders. I sometimes have dizzy spells, blurred vision. He does not have time when it comes to helping his problem. I even think about divorcing him, but that does not solve or help the problem. I really want to help him in a huge way. He is a good person if the alcohol is not around. We all have our down falls in life, so of us can help ourselves, while others need to be helped. Please help.

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

It is impossible for anyone, nomatter how expert, to help someone with a drink problem if that person insists that they have no such problem. He HAS to admit the problem, sincerely seek and work hard with expert help, and take personal responsibility for it. He should join and work with AA, they may have an AlAnon group for spouses and families of alcoholics which could help you, and he should be in a rehab program or seeing a shrink for specific help to stop drinking and to stay stopped. Stop trying to do it all for him --- you can't. Only he can. Maybe see a counsellor or shrink to help you work with your own stress and to stop feeling so responsibility for his decisions and actions. HE is drinking, you arent

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