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Question
Posted by: Angela | 2010/06/30

Life Crisis!!

Hi Doc,

I think I''m having a crisis. I was sitting at my desk doing filing and I thought to myself- I''m 23 years old. I''m in the prime of my life and I''m sitting at work every week doing filing. I send statements to over 2000 customers monthly, I record their payments, I deal with their queries..... and I file. This is not how I wanted my life to be- I fell into this job because everyone told me I need to work on my career but I HATE my job. Every day I wake up with dread, I go cry in the bathroom because there are so many other things I''d rather be doing. I don''t have money to study (I''ve been working here for 3 years and I only earn enough money to put R150 towards savings). I walk to work because I can''t afford a car- I''m the only idiot in the office who can''t afford transport. Everyone here thinks I don''t know what I''m doing (even though I''ve been working here the longest), I continuously make mistakes (maybe that''s why they think I don''t know what I''m doing), everyone takes advantage of me (they ask me to help me with this and help me with that and do that for them, bla bla bla). My boss is so busy trying to build the company that I''ve been doing the EXACT SAME THING since I''ve been working here. I’ m more like a glorified doorman- all the new people get nice offices and nice desks and new computers and I still sit at the same desk by the door This job is boring, but I don''t have experience in anything else. I can''t leave my job now- where would I go? I long for company- everyone I work with is waaaaaaaaay older than me. We NEVER get clients coming in- I worked at a shop for a short while and I LOVED dealing with all the customers! But I don''t know- I guess I''m a wuss. I feel obliged to stay at this company because they have helped me here and there. I can’ t afford to chase my dreams. I don’ t know what to do. I’ m lost and unhappy.

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

OK. From the sound of it, you are doing a really useful job ( what a greater mess life would be if there were not people doing jobs like this ) though I agree it may not feel exciting or anywhere near as wrothwhile as it is, and maybe not fulfilling, especially if you had and have larger ambitions for yourself.
You don't mention what your "career" is, as you see it, as you want it to be. I'm puzzled - if everyone else at the office can aford a car, why is this - do they earn more than you ? Is there any prospect of doing some job-related studies with funding from the company ?
If people genuinely didn't believe that you knew what you were doing, they would hardly ask you to help them with any of their work. And unless you were reliably OK at what you do, they wouldn't keep you in that job, as it'd cause such problems for them all.
Within a set job, of course you WON'T get experience of anything else, unless this gets built into your work. And its no excuse for them not to move you into more interesting work. Isn't there an HR dept or person you coulddiscuss this wirth, with a view to job enrichment, and training in other areas of the company's work ?
One thing that would start to help, would be to start to cvlarify and define your dreams ( we never reach our dreams if we're not sure what exactly they are and can't plan to get there from here ). Isnt it posible to explore looking for a different job with more customer contact, for instance, which you might enjoy more ?

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6
Our users say:
Posted by: Tersia | 2010/06/30

I had a friend at work that said she hated her job and she is going to do something about it before the end of the year.
Well she did get another job but it took her 3 months as she did not want to take something she was not happy with. First it had to be closer to home and secondly the salary should be higher and guess what she got all of it and more!
You need to have goals in life and secondly only YOU san look after yourself - GET OUT THERE AND DO IT

Reply to Tersia
Posted by: Happiness | 2010/06/30

Quit your job. You like dealing with people, so don''t rest untill you get that job.You are one of the lucky few who already know what kind of job they enjoy doing. This means you have a direction, you just need to take the first step. Face your fears head on, start with the smaller ones to gain momentum and good luck

Reply to Happiness
Posted by: Dineo | 2010/06/30

I know what you are talking about I feel your pain I am in the same situation and I am slowly trying to get out I am sending my CV all over and fortunately I get calls for interviews but I did not get an offer as yet and I am not going to give up

Reply to Dineo
Posted by: Lin | 2010/06/30

Try to get hold of this month''s Psychology mag. It has a great article in it just for you!

Reply to Lin
Posted by: Anon | 2010/06/30

You cant afford not to chase your dreams. Grab them with both hands and be glad you have them! Follow your bliss!

Reply to Anon
Posted by: cybershrink | 2010/06/30

OK. From the sound of it, you are doing a really useful job ( what a greater mess life would be if there were not people doing jobs like this ) though I agree it may not feel exciting or anywhere near as wrothwhile as it is, and maybe not fulfilling, especially if you had and have larger ambitions for yourself.
You don't mention what your "career" is, as you see it, as you want it to be. I'm puzzled - if everyone else at the office can aford a car, why is this - do they earn more than you ? Is there any prospect of doing some job-related studies with funding from the company ?
If people genuinely didn't believe that you knew what you were doing, they would hardly ask you to help them with any of their work. And unless you were reliably OK at what you do, they wouldn't keep you in that job, as it'd cause such problems for them all.
Within a set job, of course you WON'T get experience of anything else, unless this gets built into your work. And its no excuse for them not to move you into more interesting work. Isn't there an HR dept or person you coulddiscuss this wirth, with a view to job enrichment, and training in other areas of the company's work ?
One thing that would start to help, would be to start to cvlarify and define your dreams ( we never reach our dreams if we're not sure what exactly they are and can't plan to get there from here ). Isnt it posible to explore looking for a different job with more customer contact, for instance, which you might enjoy more ?

Reply to cybershrink

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