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Posted by: horsiechic | 2012-07-17

just want to talk

Hi Cybershrinky...
Hope you are well...

Just wanted to talk.... my mom passed away just over a week ago after a very short fight with cancer. Now mom and I were very close and I''m feeling the loss badly.

I don''t know if its a reaction to the loss or more body screaming for time off as I''ve had a stressful year with running to annd from hospitals and doctors and stuff but I''m just so tired.
I go to bed at night I am sleeping but when I wake up in the morning I''m just as tired as when I went to bed. I feel like I''m going to fall asleep while I''m trying to work, in fact I feel like I could take a days leave and sleep for the entire day... On Sunday I slept for 10 hours and still battled to get up yesterday morning...

What do you recommend I do? Should I take something to help me rest and relax,do I jsut need time or what??? Please help!

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

So sorry to hear of your grief. Loss of anyone significant to us is always hard, usually much harder than other people can realize. In my experience, the shorter the illness and the more unexpected the loss, the more difficult it can be for those of us kleft behind, though presumably its less awful for the person we lose. And as you imply, apart from the bare facts of such situations, there's all the extra bother of appointments, waiting rooms, organizing things.
And of course, which is why we call it Grief Work, grieving is really hard work and really exhausting.
And working through a significant grief takes at least 9 months or more, so these are still early days for you.
Time is the essential ingredient. Medication rarely helps. Counselling, if one can find a good local counsellor withe xperience of assisting with grief work, can be useful, too

The information provided does not constitute a diagnosis of your condition. You should consult a medical practitioner or other appropriate health care professional for a physical exmanication, diagnosis and formal advice. Health24 and the expert accept no responsibility or liability for any damage or personal harm you may suffer resulting from making use of this content.

3
Our users say:
Posted by: XXX | 2012-07-18

I''m very sorry to hear about your loss.I think you need to try and get away for a week or two.
I think time is the only healer in this instance.Whenever you are starting to feel really down try and quickly think of something else that is good in your life.
Naturally going for professional help will also be of benefit.

Reply to XXX
Posted by: Marelize | 2012-07-17

I hope you don''t mind that I comment. I lost my mother as well due to a long sickbed when I was only 22. My father had already passed away 8 months earlier.
I only tell you this because I regret not going to therapy earlier (only 2 years later) and was then put on a too low dose of antidepressant. I struggled for 3 years before I got help.
It may be you just need time off, because the running up and down to hospital could have made you exhausted.
Are you not due for leave soon? Try to get away, but if you struggle get help.

Reply to Marelize
Posted by: cybershrink | 2012-07-17

So sorry to hear of your grief. Loss of anyone significant to us is always hard, usually much harder than other people can realize. In my experience, the shorter the illness and the more unexpected the loss, the more difficult it can be for those of us kleft behind, though presumably its less awful for the person we lose. And as you imply, apart from the bare facts of such situations, there's all the extra bother of appointments, waiting rooms, organizing things.
And of course, which is why we call it Grief Work, grieving is really hard work and really exhausting.
And working through a significant grief takes at least 9 months or more, so these are still early days for you.
Time is the essential ingredient. Medication rarely helps. Counselling, if one can find a good local counsellor withe xperience of assisting with grief work, can be useful, too

Reply to cybershrink

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