Our expert says:
Kids are usually far more matter-of-fact than this by a divorce IF it was and is still being properly managed by BOTH parents. If mother is still stoking their concerns by suggesting that she and dad MIGHT get back together, and enlisting them to try to push him to do so, she could be still keeping the issue alive, and selfishly using the kids for her own purposes. If she initiated the divorce then delayed matters, etc., this sounds in character.
The kids should have no reason to hate you, unless she is blaming you as the sole reason dad isn't coming back to her. Maybe discuss this with your husband, and consider a calm discussion between both of you with the kids, so as to better understand what's going on
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