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Question
Posted by: anoni | 2009-07-17

it' s me ?

i am angry at myself because even though i have left my fiance who was cheating on me,I managed to get myself into some arrangement with a man who is commited to someone else,i tried telling him how I feel about him and he does not entertain it,I am angry cause I let things go this far,but why does he phone me,email me,invites me to his place if he is commited to someone else,why am i falling for all of this ??

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Our expert says:
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OK, be calm and don't panic. It too often happens that one flees from a relationship that turned sour or painful and rushed straight into another. This is why it is important to take one's time and recover from the first bad elationship, before allowing one's neediness to push one into what may well be a second unhappy relationship, without someone keen to take advantage of your vuilnerability. You say you knew he was committed to someone else --- still experiencing the pain of being cheated on, why did you try to invite him to cheat on someone else ? And you know that if he is eager to cheat on her, he'll cheat on you just as readily. Take control of this, stop taking his calls and messages, and tell him it would be over if there was ever anythig to be over. And take time to heal your vulnerabilities before plunging into another relationship

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