Our expert says:
You weren't wrong about what married life SHOULD be, though sadly this is what it sometimes is, with a selfish husband. His comments to you sound purely ignorant --- when is HE going to grow up and start behaving like a husband and father ? Maybe he is judging by his own experience of his parent's mariage ?
Enjoying quality time together IS part of taking care of a spouse and family.
If you'll look back at previous messages in this forum, this is a sadly common theme --- a man more married to his family than to his own wife and children.
You are not being at all unreasonable. Unrealisic ? well, if he was as caring towards you as he is to his family, there'd probably be no problem. So he IS capable of it, but misdirected.
and anyone who thinks of themselves as someone who "doesn't apologise" is big-headed and too proud to face the fact that he, like everyone of us, makes mistakes, and needs to put them right.
Marriage counselling would be helpful if he could monly recognize that it is needed and that HE needs it even more than you do. Is there anyone in the family who he respects but who could be sympathetic to your plight, and who could talk to him ?
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