Our expert says:
Ooosh, yes, a long one.
There are many possible reasons for a loving person to have very low libido, including Depression and the impact on their self-image ( and their assumptions about sex ) of past experiences. Good that she is now seeing a psychologist, and I hope she ios being truly frank with him / her. She sounds immature if she can't manage normal intimacy for lack of her cats or her own home. You sound like the sort of partner most women dream of.
Personal identity must be found within oneself, and not based on things and possessions. One doesn't "find oneself" out there, like Tasmania, but within.
Couples counselling, as well as her individual work with her shrink, may stll be a good idea, not to glue this relationship back together, but to help both of you understand better what is happening between you, and to be better capable of building and maintaining relationships.
Sympathy makes some very good points
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