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Question
Posted by: michelle | 2010/07/30

Is this a MAN thing or is he an idiot?

Let me try &  make this simple &  not too long. Been living with my fiance for 3 yrs &  no matter what we argue about we alwasy end up fighting about MONEY. Allow me 2 give a little back ground so you can understand why i ask the above ques. I ask him y he does not help me around the house as i feel like i am the maid. I cook, do dishes, washing tidy up on days that the maid is not there. He feels i dont do the washing as the machine does??
He will ALWAYS reply that he pays the rent, water &  lights and the maid.
On average he will do dishes 1nce a mont and he feels thats enuf as he pays rent etc.
When i DARE to mention that I buy ALL the groceries he will reply by saying that it was the arrangement when we moved in.
NOW - hear me out - I feel that i contribute alot financially but he does not c it that way.
in 2008 - I paid for half our annual leave as he was unable to.
in 2009 I paid for a cruise as well as a long weekend away.
this year i opted to sit thisone out and see what he does... NOTHING. Says we cant afford to go away.
At least twice a month I pay for dinner - I get tired of cooking.
Y does he feel it such a nessicity to say that he pays rent and that it should be unuf and that i shld be happy with that?
I have now decided to keep record of everytihng I buy for the house and do. Let me just say that i VERY seldom spend money on myself - most of what i do goes towards the house, pets and him and my 21 year old lazy son.

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

It's NOT a "man thing" - he's lazy and spoiled. Maybe his mom did everything for him, and he has larned to expect that from the women in his life. Why on earth do you agree to indulge this selfish and lazy guy ?

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Our users say:
Posted by: joe soap | 2010/08/04

I''m a guy and my girlfriend thinks that its not a mans job in the kitchen or to hang curtains. I beleive that we are a couple and should do things together. She feels that it ok for her to go shopping with her friend while I look after the kids then she goes drinking at friends, without telling me and when I get upset about it, she thinks I''m wrong.We arrange to go out for supper as a family, and behind my back she invites her friend and friends mother to come, when we arrive I find out that the friend has invited a friend, and when i get upset that a family outing has turned into a free for all, I''m wrong and my behaviour is wrong. If her mother has never heard of a man helping in the kitchen then that is law. Also I must always be happy and friendly even if I dont feel like it because that what her family say.

Reply to joe soap
Posted by: Odette | 2010/07/30

Well done Sandy.That is exactly why you are married for 25 years!!!

Reply to Odette
Posted by: Sandy | 2010/07/30

To give you an idea of how things should work. I have been married for 25 years and have two children. My husband and I have always jointly covered all expenses. My husband helps with EVERYTHING around the house, because we both work full time. In fact I would say he does more in the way of domestic chores than me, and helps the children with homework and does all the running around to and from school.
His life revolves around his family. How will you cope one day when you have children?...gap it now, before it is too late ! There is nothing worse than a selfish lazy man!

Reply to Sandy
Posted by: Sandy | 2010/07/30

He is a selfish idiot..plain and simple. Move on girlfriend !

Reply to Sandy
Posted by: cybershrink | 2010/07/30

It's NOT a "man thing" - he's lazy and spoiled. Maybe his mom did everything for him, and he has larned to expect that from the women in his life. Why on earth do you agree to indulge this selfish and lazy guy ?

Reply to cybershrink

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