Our expert says:
Drinking and the weed, and the partying, if a large part of his agenda, could be continuing problems : and doesn't seem to fit with a guy so devoted to caring for his mother than he wants to switch from an engagement with definite marriage plans, to an auition for you. . Its admirable that he wants to be able to look after his mom ( if she does indeed have significant health problems.) But he does sound as though he underestimated his duties towards you as a fiancee.
Your concerns are fully valid. And he can't be very experienced with women if he doesn't realize that putting three strong-willed women within one household mis likely to cause conflict. And as you are expected to abaodnon your wish for a household for just the pair of you, expecting you to pay to convert his mom's home sounds rather cheeky.
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