Who knows ? Presumably he does. Maybe it wasn't wise to have 3 children with a guy who was unemployed ( in terms of the best interests of the children ) but its understandable. I don't quite understand what you mean about him "having another number you don't know of" - presmably you know of it, but don't have the number ? Is it maybe just for work ? Then you talk of his "lies and secrets" - do you mean these are suspicions you have, or has it been reasonably proved that he has been lying and keeping significant secrets ?
I'm not sure for what innocent reason he'd need to be regularly chatting with "other women" other than those he must work with in terms of his job.
DO you know ( or does he explain ) why he spends so much time online when he is home ( when presumably he'd want to be spending more time with you ) ?
If you "flew up to surprize him" ( assuming there's someone reliable to look after the kids ) it'd cost a lot, and isn't it likely you would find nothing, even if there was something sneaky going on ? Are you equipped to be a mysterious and secret spy or detective ?
Dont you, rather, just need to sit down with him next time he's home, and calmly outline all the reasons you feel uneasy, and ask him to discuss this with you ?
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