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Question
Posted by: Morgan Johnson | 2010/05/09

Is it that hes not that into me?

My boyfriend and i have known each other for over 3 years, we have a baby together. How long in general does it take a guy to propose? and if he doesnt what are the reasons? hes too set in his ways, hes not that into me - but then he wouldnt be with me? i have spoken to him and he says he has plans to make before - but these plans never come into being?

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

I understand that in some cultural traditions, pregnancy before marriage is accepted - but whatever the cultural beliefs,it is not wise to have a baby with any guy until you know each other well enough to know that you DO plan to stay together and marry or otherwise form a long-lasting partnershuip.
If you give a man all he wants, sex, child, home, etc, he can gind he is very comfortable as things are and sees no benefits for himself in mariage.
A couple who are ready to have a child together should already have formed JOINT plans, for their joint futures - anything else is unfair to both ( but especially the woman ) and unfair to the child, too.

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2
Our users say:
Posted by: True | 2010/05/10

Well said CS, to think that im also practising vat n sat!!! What a waste of time..

Reply to True
Posted by: cybershrink | 2010/05/09

I understand that in some cultural traditions, pregnancy before marriage is accepted - but whatever the cultural beliefs,it is not wise to have a baby with any guy until you know each other well enough to know that you DO plan to stay together and marry or otherwise form a long-lasting partnershuip.
If you give a man all he wants, sex, child, home, etc, he can gind he is very comfortable as things are and sees no benefits for himself in mariage.
A couple who are ready to have a child together should already have formed JOINT plans, for their joint futures - anything else is unfair to both ( but especially the woman ) and unfair to the child, too.

Reply to cybershrink

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