Our expert says:
Is this a learned hate, or do you really have good reasons that lead to your feelings about him ? And why can't you acept, if you'd like your husband to accept your felings as understandable, that you won't let yourself accept that his feelings, though different from yours, are also valid ? The reation you describe sounds truly excessive, especially i you can;t recall any incidents as a basis for these. Seeing a psychologist to gain better understanding of and control over, these feelings. There does seem to be a fiercely irrational aspect to these reations, which are having a distinctly negative impact on your life in general. Maybe p[art of this is learned from your father's apparently equally fierce and irrational prejudices here.
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