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Question
Posted by: Angry | 2010-09-06

interfering mother-in -law

Hi, I live approx 2km from my mother in law, an she has just become so overbearing,I can''t cope with her. she had lack of funds, so I purchase the food for dinner and she cooks for us all (win win situation) but this is becoming a problem, it is as if I owe her something... I just did this to assist her, I can qutie easily cook for my family. She now wants to move into our house, as she has sold hers for money to live off, I simply cannot lice with her - how could I say something to my husband without this turning into a disaster - I love my husband dearly and I don''t want to lose him, nor do I want to hurt him, but I can''t be near his mom, I think I might just lose my mind - please advise me...

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

You obviously need to discuss this with your husband, calmly but firmly, emphasizing how you both want to be helful to his mom, without allowing her to take over. Maybe she is being extra overbearing and pushy to over-compensate for feling powerless and impoverished and unable to actually finance herself. Your husband needs to recognize that allowing his mom to dictate how things are to be, to suit herself, and without taking your wishes and eneds into consideration, is a recipe for serious problems. Maybe even a couple of sessions with a marriage counsellor would be wise

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Our users say:
Posted by: cybershrink | 2010-09-06

You obviously need to discuss this with your husband, calmly but firmly, emphasizing how you both want to be helful to his mom, without allowing her to take over. Maybe she is being extra overbearing and pushy to over-compensate for feling powerless and impoverished and unable to actually finance herself. Your husband needs to recognize that allowing his mom to dictate how things are to be, to suit herself, and without taking your wishes and eneds into consideration, is a recipe for serious problems. Maybe even a couple of sessions with a marriage counsellor would be wise

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