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Question
Posted by: Trevor | 2011/01/18

Inter Racial Relationships

Guys i am in no way a racist person - just curious. How many of you guys would date or marry someone outside of your race?

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

Why does this matter to you ? Cultural differences can cause some problems, either between or within races. But many happy relationships transcend that

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Our users say:
Posted by: my life | 2011/01/26

i am white and have a child with black man. my family never accepted the father and have never met him in 16 years!! this makes things difficult for everyone - there are these unspoken uncomfortable issues. before going for this and even having kids, make sure how you will raise the kids - which traditions are they going to follow? if it is your husband''s, would you be able to stand behind that decision when your child does not want it in his/her life? if your family does not accept it, and you have a relively good realtionship with them, it is not worth the trouble and continuous stress! but then, this is only my experience and i have been separated from the father for 12 years...difficult path to choose for your life. if you are into challenges, go for it. if you are into rebelling, leave it now and save yourself a lot of stress!

Reply to my life
Posted by: Carry | 2011/01/20

I think it depends on what race you are. You won''t find may white people that would date other races, but you find that any race would date a white person. That is just a fact!

Reply to Carry
Posted by: Wise Owl | 2011/01/19

Guys and Girls !! The interracial thing on a permanent basis where kids results is just NOT a good idea. No matter how much of a free thinker you are and how much colour " is not important"  in reality it IS.
Each individual race IS naturally proud of their own clear bloodlines and do not want them bastardized. The proud Zulu family does not want an organge haired mongrel included in their race. where one of their own have mated with a white.
That off spring will always be prejudiced, no matter where in the world they go simply becuase they are mongrels.
Everyone gravitates to the race in which they feel at home and comfortable. Face it don''t fight it.

Reply to Wise Owl
Posted by: Wise Owl | 2011/01/19

Guys and Girls !! The interracial thing on a permanent basis where kids results is just NOT a good idea. No matter how much of a free thinker you are and how much colour " is not important"  in reality it IS.
Each individual race IS naturally proud of their own clear bloodlines and do not want them bastardized. The proud Zulu family does not want an organge haired mongrel included in their race. where one of their own have mated with a white.
That off spring will always be prejudiced, no matter where in the world they go simply becuase they are mongrels.
Everyone gravitates to the race in which they feel at home and comfortable. Face it don''t fight it.

Reply to Wise Owl
Posted by: Indain Gent | 2011/01/19

I hear what you are saying Carly - in this day and age it is really difficult to trust anyone.

Reply to Indain Gent
Posted by: Carly | 2011/01/19

Yeah u right, not all men are the same ...... there are a FEW exceptions ..... have read too many postings on this forum about women who have been abused be it verbally, emotionally or otherwise ...

Reply to Carly
Posted by: Indian | 2011/01/19

Carly i understand that this is not a dating site. They were just stories. Not all men are the same.

Reply to Indian
Posted by: Carly | 2011/01/19

This is not a dating site PLEASE REMEMBER THAT!!!! And no I for one would never date an indian man .. heard too many horror stories about the way they treat women .....

Reply to Carly
Posted by: Indian Gent | 2011/01/19

Any of you ladies will date me?

Reply to Indian Gent
Posted by: Pixi | 2011/01/19

LOL LOL VRYE DENKER .... love your comments !

I am white and do not smell like onions when I sweat, I am not blond and I do not sleep around and yes I am also looked down upon .... LMBFAO!!! I have many, many male friends and am never short of a date when I need one! HAHA this is quite funny .... furthermore I would NEVER date a chinese man ... they are just plain creepy ..

Reply to Pixi
Posted by: Vrye Denker | 2011/01/19

Mind you, if she isn''t fat and has all her teeth, it doesn''t matter what colour she is.

Reply to Vrye Denker
Posted by: Romany | 2011/01/19

I think it all depends on how much you value your culture and heritage.
One should consider this carefully, especially before having children with another race, nationality, religion etc etc.
If you value your culture and " where you come from"  you would probably realise that you want to carry this over to the children you will bring into this world with pride.
" Mixing blood"  of 2 ''differents"  WILL destroy this and we will all end up as yellowish/pinkish/greyish people with zero inheritance.
Dating on the other hand, why not?

Reply to Romany
Posted by: WHAT I LEARNED FROM THESE POSTS | 2011/01/18

I am a white girl, from these posts I learn
1. I am looked down upon
2. I smell like onions when I sweat
Perhaps thats why l cannot get a date LOL

Reply to WHAT I LEARNED FROM THESE POSTS
Posted by: Anon to Liza | 2011/01/18

Sorry Liza, but you stereo typing Muslims from what you watch on TV. Should I look at you like a person who belives anything (like most Christians) hail the Pope and FOR WHAT? Your beliefs change with the way world turns. I''m sure when weed will be legal, the bible will be changed to allow thee to smoke thy herb!! So please, save what you think about Muslims to yourself as you know nothing. If you had half of the respect of most religions and cultures in South Africa, you wouldnt sleep around like most of the minority in SA do. Look at most porn, why do you think we say cheap blonds. Whites are now looked down upon.

Reply to Anon to Liza
Posted by: Anon | 2011/01/18

Not again. Coloured guy dated a few white girls in high school and varsity. Most as nice as they were, smelt like onions when they sweated. No offense. Only dated one black girl - cant comment. It didnt work out but we remainded friends. As much as people hate to differ, it is easier to date within, however, if life was expected to be so easy, why we living. Its about new experiences and having some fun when you dont have much responsibilities. I am friends with all races however, am unfortunate to befriend a chinese. None of my friends also personally know some so its harder. But I know I will be friends with one in time to come so I can get to know their culture from him/ her.

Reply to Anon
Posted by: another anon | 2011/01/18

Trevor you asked anon what race she was. If you read her first reply to you she states she is coloured.

Personally I also think it is a personal issue - it depends who you fall in love with.

Obviously family, extended family and friends play a part here. The person choosing to marry someone from another culture/race group could and may face ostricism from family and friends.

As we are social beings and groups and family are important to most of us... what question you should really ask is. What do I want? What is good for me? How would my family feel? How would my family react? What does my family mean to me?

I quite like Liza''s response because she has very definite views and opinions. She also knows who she is and what she wants and what she doesn''t want.

For me personally I am married to man from a different culture, we are considered the same race. It can become a problem with children involved and family and friends. We sorted out our problems and differences so it is not a problem to us. This goes for religious differences/cultural differences etc as well.

Reply to another anon
Posted by: Liza | 2011/01/18

Some people are able to look beyond skin colour. I don''t have a skin color preference, but I do have certain cultural preferences - i.e. Cultures that oppress women are a definite no-no (like muslim culture). I''m a professional woman earning my own salary and that''s the way I like it! I''m not an unpaid domestic and I don''t do the barefoot and pregnant in the kitchen thing. Religious reasons for multiple wives are also a definite no-no. A relationship is a partnership where both parties have EQUAL say. Needless to say, most of the first dates I go on is also the last date I go on with the same guy.

Reply to Liza
Posted by: Vrye Denker | 2011/01/18

I am willing to get into a relationship with Japanese, Indian and Jewish girls, but I don''t like the idea of dating black chicks. It''s just a personal preferrence, like preferring a Porsche over a Maserati.

Reply to Vrye Denker
Posted by: Trevor | 2011/01/18

I agree with waht you are saying Just my opinion. I am an indian gent. Why do you ask?

Reply to Trevor
Posted by: Just my opinion ... | 2011/01/18

What''s with this question ... if you want to date someone of another race do it, not necessary to find out whether anyone else is doing it .... surely you don''t need anyone''s approval do you? And no, I would not date/marry someone of another race as our cultures would clash too much. I work with a Hindu woman who had a child with a Muslim man ...... they could not get along no matter how hard she tried! He expected her to accept his way of doing things or hit the road ... needless to say it did not work out and now she has to raise her child on her own! I know that is just one isolated incident, but I still believe that the cultural differences will inevitably some time or another cause problems! What race are you Trevor????

Reply to Just my opinion ...
Posted by: schumi | 2011/01/18

i love car races, i love bike races, i just love race, racing, ok any race..

Reply to schumi
Posted by: Trevor | 2011/01/18

I agree Anon. If i may ask waht race are you?

Reply to Trevor
Posted by: Anon | 2011/01/18

I am coloured and have a beautiful 4 year old daughter from a Zulu guy. I have dated all races and to make it makes no differences. There are issues in terms of beliefs etc but if you love each other enough you will compromise. I dont see colour, to me it makes no difference, to me its about the person I fall in love with. How does the colour of someone''s skin define who they truly are?

Reply to Anon
Posted by: Trevor | 2011/01/18

If i may ask - what race are you Definitely and what race would yoy date or marry?

Reply to Trevor
Posted by: TLS | 2011/01/18

No I woud not as there are cultural differences and it may cause problems in a relationship.

Reply to TLS
Posted by: definitely | 2011/01/18

Without question I would

Reply to definitely
Posted by: ???? | 2011/01/18

FOUR

Reply to ????
Posted by: cybershrink | 2011/01/18

Why does this matter to you ? Cultural differences can cause some problems, either between or within races. But many happy relationships transcend that

Reply to cybershrink
Posted by: cybershrink | 2011/01/18

Why does this matter to you ? Cultural differences can cause some problems, either between or within races. But many happy relationships transcend that

Reply to cybershrink

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