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Question
Posted by: El | 2011-03-30

Institutionalise Involuntarily

My Husband is very ill. Im convinced he is bipolar ++

However after dealing with this for about 2 years now I still cannot get him to seek medical help.
In momments of lucidity and after a manic episode he asks for help, but as soon as I try to take action it causes the cycle to begin from scratch.

I cannot even plead with family for help as everyone thinks Im being a ''know it all'' How can you help someone if they not even willing to get a proper diagnosis?

The problem being is that his mood swings can be unpredictable and he has started to become abusive when in a rage. I need to do something to protect myself and my children. My children are being subjected to stuff that Im concerned will seriously negatively affect them!! :(

I still want to be there to support him, but how do I get him the help that he so obviously needs?
How do I go about institutionalising him so he can get the help he needs before he harms himself or one of us?

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

Sadly, one often comes across someone who to others seems clearly unwell, but who refuses to admit it or to seek help and expert advice, and until they do, one really cannot help them. IF they are considered by a doctor to be a significant risk to themselves or to others, then there are some possibilities of seeking compulsory assessment or even treatment. Something like Bipolar Disorder sounds possible ( of course an accurate diagnosis is necessary to decide what treatment might help ) but there are other possibilities. Is there, for instance, a possibility of drug and/or alcohol abuse, and maybe cycles of withdrawal and then re-intoxication ? You can discuss this with your GP if you have one and if he knows your husband. If the children are at some risk, Child Welfare might be able to advise, but the issue needs to be kept focussed on how to get a proper assessment and treatment of your husband, rather than any thought of removing the children from your care. Do you have any option of taking the children and statying with your own family to protect yourselves and help him recognize that this is a serious matter ?

The information provided does not constitute a diagnosis of your condition. You should consult a medical practitioner or other appropriate health care professional for a physical exmanication, diagnosis and formal advice. Health24 and the expert accept no responsibility or liability for any damage or personal harm you may suffer resulting from making use of this content.

5
Our users say:
Posted by: A.I. | 2011-03-30

Reply to A.I.
Posted by: El | 2011-03-30

a.i.
All good and well but there is more to his problem and it shows. The rage is quite frightening and I have a nice few bruises to show for it. I dont want to have to put up with bad treatment even though I know he cannot help most of his behaviour. I also have to deal with his depression and paranoia and then he has stages when he treats the children bad too - that is unbearable!!

He does not function as he used to. He cannot work and were as sometimes he can keep house and is reall good at that - there will be weeks on end were he''ll just sit on the couch and not budge and be moody and difficult and antisocial - a lilttle bit of antisocial behavior too now that i think of it.
Such a far cry from the happy outgoing person i know he is inside with go getter qualities.

Sad

Reply to El
Posted by: A.I. | 2011-03-30

Look if he can still keep it together to function then there''s no way you will be able to put him away in an institution. This alone, that you are struggling to find a way to help him, shows that there is still much cognitive function going on within him.

Your only option is to talk to him make an open ongoing conversation and he himself must want to get help, and the help he accepts might not be time in a nut farm, learn now to live with that.

Reply to A.I.
Posted by: El | 2011-03-30

Hi Doc

He is not using drug as he is unable to work (I am the ony breadwinner and do not allow him over large amounts of money) He is in a controlled environment. So the option of leaving him - when I am the one providing everything is a bit difficult.
I could speak to our GP or possibly a Psycologist that he saw a few years back (she did recommend further sessions, but he did not want to return.

I have heard of involuntary assessment and I believe its the only way.

Reply to El
Posted by: cybershrink | 2011-03-30

Sadly, one often comes across someone who to others seems clearly unwell, but who refuses to admit it or to seek help and expert advice, and until they do, one really cannot help them. IF they are considered by a doctor to be a significant risk to themselves or to others, then there are some possibilities of seeking compulsory assessment or even treatment. Something like Bipolar Disorder sounds possible ( of course an accurate diagnosis is necessary to decide what treatment might help ) but there are other possibilities. Is there, for instance, a possibility of drug and/or alcohol abuse, and maybe cycles of withdrawal and then re-intoxication ? You can discuss this with your GP if you have one and if he knows your husband. If the children are at some risk, Child Welfare might be able to advise, but the issue needs to be kept focussed on how to get a proper assessment and treatment of your husband, rather than any thought of removing the children from your care. Do you have any option of taking the children and statying with your own family to protect yourselves and help him recognize that this is a serious matter ?

Reply to cybershrink

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