Posted by: Anon | 2009-04-29


Dear Cybershrink.
Thing is we didn' t ask her for the money or in any way hint to her that we need money. She just put it in my account. She is not in speaking term with anyone who makes her aware that she trying to control them. I guess am just another number on the list.
She uses her money as a power tool to control people, including her own mom, cousin' s etc. Thise who don' t speak up to her is because they really need her financial assistance even though she " steals"  the money. She told me not to mention the money in front of her husband this a a scheme she runs with her mom. I actually told her that never again should she give us money since it makes me uncomfortable.
She like acting reaching and paying for things that do not concern her only to try and CONTROL you since she has done you a " favor" .
My calls, emails &  smses were to try and sort things out and she actually hang up on me once when she was speaking to my husband and he passed the phone to me. HOW RUDE?
All of a sudden she has become " friends"  with my husband' s ex gf and she even visits her family. What is she trying to do or proof?

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

THen a family group should speak to her, politely and pleasantly, but firmly, and say that she should not make assumptions like this, and just out money into your account mwithout being asked, and then assume she is everyone else's boss. And if she is so childish as to sulk when anyone suggests she is trying to control them ( as obviously she is ) then she should be ignored. And if she "steals" the money in any sense, if it is dirty money and perhaps gotten illegally, then nobody should accept any of it, and return it to her if she sends it. Why is she so scaed someone might tell her husband about this ? What would happen if someone did so ?
She sounds like someone who actually has low self-esteem, and tries to get money ( from anywhere, anyhow ) to try to buy power and if she can't make people like her, she can at least make them bothered by her money and the power it gives her.

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