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Question
Posted by: guy | 2011/02/24

in debt

hi there.i have a wonderful gf that ive been with for 2 years.we are very in love and want to get married.my problem is that i have alot of debt that i didnt tell her about.she found out when people started phoning and asking for payments.she was very upset that i hadnt told her but also very understanding and patient.she told me that we would work on it together.we dont have a car even.but she has never complained.only supported me.the problem is that now there is another account that i havnt paid.i didnt hide it from her.i truly forgot.now our living expenses wont be met if we make payments on it.she was upset and said that she feels like were moving back instead of forward.she says she would never leave me because of the money but she wants us to have a good future.this girl is amazing.she is gorgeous,smart and funny.i dont know why shes with me.im afraid she feels like its not worth it and leaves me.there is a guy that is interested in her and he has alot of money.she told him to leave her alone and that shes not interested.but im afraid if i dont make a plan she might change her mind.what can i do?i desperately need help

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

If you're thinking of marriage, debt is one of the many things you should NOT keep secret. And as you see, now that she has found out about it, she is supportive and helpful. Can you take on some extra work or odd jobs to earn a bit more to get through these debts ? And have you spoken with a proper debt counsellor, perhaps at your bank ?

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Our users say:
Posted by: Lolo | 2011/02/25

Visit Old Mutual they have a way to kinder pay all the Acc and you have one Persolan Loan with them.

I had about R37000 debts, now ia have R33000 payment that i will make to Old Mutual.

Reply to Lolo
Posted by: Wise Owl | 2011/02/24

You are suffering from a very common SA ailment. " I want it all and I want it now" . It''s immature and irresponsible to buy things you cannot afford and to cap it all, you " forgot"  about some debt. Duh !!!
Now that you have had your head washed, you may want to stop and take some adult advice as provided for by Peas. Oh by the way, you will have to admit your irresponsibility to yourself and your long suffering girlfriend and really feel bad about it. Stay away from marriage until you have grown up, financially speaking, as THAT is just an invitation to open a whole big can of " Whip Arse" 

Reply to Wise Owl
Posted by: Peas | 2011/02/24

Go under Debt Review. They will take one sum from you monthly and distribute to your creditors. You are not allowed to make extra debt until your old debt is paid off and you cannot loose any belongings.

Reply to Peas
Posted by: cybershrink | 2011/02/24

If you're thinking of marriage, debt is one of the many things you should NOT keep secret. And as you see, now that she has found out about it, she is supportive and helpful. Can you take on some extra work or odd jobs to earn a bit more to get through these debts ? And have you spoken with a proper debt counsellor, perhaps at your bank ?

Reply to cybershrink

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