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Question
Posted by: Nadine | 2011-01-25

I''m so tired

I''ve been with my boyfriend for 5 years and we have a 3 year old son, I''ve just found out that he was still using drugs and some of his most violent outbursts have been when he was high. I''m so tired and extremely depressed because I want out and I''ve told him to move out, but now he''s changing it all and calling me selfish and accusing me of " playing the victim"  etc. I just want him to leave me alone. I''m so angry towards him and his family for painting me as the black sheep, I''ve told his parents about his drug problem and the violence and they''ve avoided any kind of a discussion with him. He refuses to go for any kind of therapy because " he''s not mad"  and I''m crazy because I think that he has a problem. If I had a magic wand, I would wish him away. I know that I should go for therapy and I''m looking for a new therapist.

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

If he is taking drugs and having violent outbursts, you are not playing a victim role, you are indeed a victim. And when you say "still using drugs" His family must be very foolish if they don't know about his drug abuse and violent outbursts. Are his parents perhaps scared of him, too.
He seems to be working the popular excuse that you need to be "mad" to see a shrink or otherwise get treatment, whereas its much more mad NOT to get help you need. Discuss this with your counsellor, and protect yourself and the child above all.

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2
Our users say:
Posted by: WENA | 2011-01-25

Get legal advice to get him out. Your son should not be exposed to this.

Reply to WENA
Posted by: cybershrink | 2011-01-25

If he is taking drugs and having violent outbursts, you are not playing a victim role, you are indeed a victim. And when you say "still using drugs" His family must be very foolish if they don't know about his drug abuse and violent outbursts. Are his parents perhaps scared of him, too.
He seems to be working the popular excuse that you need to be "mad" to see a shrink or otherwise get treatment, whereas its much more mad NOT to get help you need. Discuss this with your counsellor, and protect yourself and the child above all.

Reply to cybershrink

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