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Question
Posted by: j | 2010/03/09

if my husband cheated

i believe in yin and yang and balancing acts.
so if my husband was flirting with other women at work, on blackberry or whatever then.. I would do the same.
and be all secretive about it.
How does your own medicine taste today honey, would you like some broccoli with that?
Needless to say, the same would happen with cheating.
Monkey see / feel, Monkey do.
I know, you end up both acting like monkeys, and the relationship will most likely not survive this " same medicinal treatment"  BUT it''s either that or have to live seeing your husband go gaga for other random women all over, and/or live with the pain and mistrust from an affair.
What kind of life is that? It''s torture.
So return the favour, smile, and leave.
With kisses...
xxx

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

I understand your idea, but considering the high risks, of emotional problems and STD, etc., from an affair that sounds more like tit for tat than yin and yang. Depends on whether you prefer tat to yang, I suppose.
do you really have to also have an afair, to show that you're just as tacky as he is ? If you insisted, you could torment him with your skillful secrecy and sneakiness without ever actually cheating ( safer for you and more annoying for him, as he could never find a non-existent lover ).
You seem to assume a false alternative - either cheating yourself as well, or living and accepting and feeling bad about his cheating. Ever heard of divorce, moving on, and living the happy life you deserve ?

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Our users say:
Posted by: j | 2010/03/09

You are indeed wise. I like the part about making him " think"  you having an affair, but not actualy doing it.
I suppose if push comes to shove, actually physically cheating may not be as easy for some as for others... good point. yuck
Thanks CS

Reply to j
Posted by: om | 2010/03/09

you seem to have the logic of a 5 year old devoid of any real grace, forgiveness, understanding relationship sustaining love or most importantly the ability to trust.

i am marvelled at how you can even be in any form of meaningful relationship with an attitude and outlook such as you have.

Reply to om
Posted by: cybershrink | 2010/03/09

I understand your idea, but considering the high risks, of emotional problems and STD, etc., from an affair that sounds more like tit for tat than yin and yang. Depends on whether you prefer tat to yang, I suppose.
do you really have to also have an afair, to show that you're just as tacky as he is ? If you insisted, you could torment him with your skillful secrecy and sneakiness without ever actually cheating ( safer for you and more annoying for him, as he could never find a non-existent lover ).
You seem to assume a false alternative - either cheating yourself as well, or living and accepting and feeling bad about his cheating. Ever heard of divorce, moving on, and living the happy life you deserve ?

Reply to cybershrink

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