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Question
Posted by: kris | 2010/02/01

I' m afraid I might have an STD after cheating on my husband....stupid I know

A month ago I did a really, really stupid thing that I regret si bad. I have been using condoms with my sxual partners from the day I started being sexually active. The only guy who I slept with without a condom is now my husband. Even now in my arriage I use a condom. A month ago I strayed and slept with someone else. I cheated and the guy didn' t used a condom, how stupid was I to even allow that to happen. I' ve been praying and hoping that I wouldn' t have to worry but now I am cause since Wedn my vagina has been itchy...I' m afraid, so afraid. I have scheduled an app with a Dr and I' m so ashamed of myself..
CS should I call the guy and ask him about his sexual history?? I' m afraid what if it' s herpes, hiv..or one of the iincurable deseases. What am I going to say to my Dr? Is it a good idea to call the guy before I even go and see my Dr? OR should I wait until I know what is going on? Please advice

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

Well, I won't disagree with your assessment. The cheating was dumb, and not using a condom was dumb.You may well have an STD, and should refrain from having sex with your husband until you have seen and consulted the doc.
With your doctor be entirely frank and truthful - nobody ever benefits from lying to their doctor, and he is supposed to keep such confessions confidential.What matters first is whether you have an infection, if so what, and how to treat it, and whether your husband can have caught it, and whether he needs treatment.
Your lover presumabl knows what's wrong with him, though you may want to call and remind him. More to the point, your husband deserves to knwo that he may be innocently infected, and may need treatment

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9
Our users say:
Posted by: Anonymous | 2015/08/04

Slut

Reply to Anonymous
Posted by: Red | 2010/02/02

You make your bed, you sleep in it. Isn' t that so??

Reply to Red
Posted by: I believe | 2010/02/02

Karma my ass, theres no such thing..we are human and we make mistakes..Tell me how many people cheat and get away with it everday?

kris, u made a mistake, attend to ur health problem then learn to forgive urself..whilst u in a process of forgiving urself also identify the problem that lead u to cheating and deal with it.

Reply to I believe
Posted by: Kristen | 2010/02/02

Karma is a b!*$#. Your husband really deserves better than you. Hope he figures it out before you infect him. You dont really sound remorseful about cheating just the STD. Shame on you.

Reply to Kristen
Posted by: Kristen | 2010/02/02

Karma is a b!*$#. Your husband really deserves better than you. Hope he figures it out before you infect him. You dont really sound remorseful about cheating just the STD. Shame on you.

Reply to Kristen
Posted by: ami | 2010/02/01

hi Kris.
i had a similar experience with regards to the ' discomfort'  a little while after sleeping with a new partner. It was painfully itchy and inflamed. Instead of going to the doc, I was also terrified that I had contracted some sort of STD. However, I first tried the anti-fungal cream and applicators for what I thought might have been thrush or the likes. I used it for a couple weeks and it cleared up nicely - and I' m negative for any STD.
I wouldn' t normally recommend not seeing your doctor, but perhaps you want to try the vaginal cream (which you can buy from any pharmacy over the counter) to save you the embarrassment.
However, I DO recommend seeking some sort of professional advice on your being unfaithful to your husband! This sort of thing, maybe not now, but can ruin a marriage in the future when you least expect it!
best of luck.

Reply to ami
Posted by: Your name | 2010/02/01

....ok....one question......if the guy you cheated with actually put a rubber on......would you still feel......so.....bad? Seems the main fear you have is a serious disease....which may or may not lead to death....or the shame of the whole thing....shame or death...thats whats got you terrified. IF this is for real best thing you can do....is tell your husband...get it out and begin to heal, otherwise after you find out you dont have aids or any other STD you' ll just end up doing the same thing again...believe it or not physical impications from sexually activity are no where near as eternally harmful as the spiritual impacts. Trust me its pretty daunting if your single and having fun with multiple partners, its even worse if you have commited to be faithful and well.....havent been (and if God was invited to your wedding to make it spiritually formal then you better either stop cheating remain faithful or just get a divorce....by the way technically and spiritually you are now divorced the bond between you and your husband is broken you are one flesh no more!)

dont stress about hiv...(which is the worst you can get STD wise) they already have the cure and will be promoting it soon.....the psychological warfare effect has now warn off and people arent scared of sex anymore.......

Reply to Your name
Posted by: kris | 2010/02/01

Thanks CS,
I will be truthfull with my doctor and I' m not worried about my husand as we use a condom everytime. Oh God I hope I don' t have anything serious. I' ve been crying the whole morning today, uncontrollably..I regret my actions and I feel so bad.

Reply to kris
Posted by: cybershrink | 2010/02/01

Well, I won't disagree with your assessment. The cheating was dumb, and not using a condom was dumb.You may well have an STD, and should refrain from having sex with your husband until you have seen and consulted the doc.
With your doctor be entirely frank and truthful - nobody ever benefits from lying to their doctor, and he is supposed to keep such confessions confidential.What matters first is whether you have an infection, if so what, and how to treat it, and whether your husband can have caught it, and whether he needs treatment.
Your lover presumabl knows what's wrong with him, though you may want to call and remind him. More to the point, your husband deserves to knwo that he may be innocently infected, and may need treatment

Reply to cybershrink

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