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Question
Posted by: Kate | 2011-07-13

I will never go all out in our relationship

He told me he will never go all out in a relationship because of stories he hears about other people''s relationship. He does not want to be a victim of love. I REALLY LOVE THIS MAN but after what he said last night i think i have to make a decision. Please advice

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

As so often in questions of this type, I must ask, not "why do you love him ", as that is not a rational and planned decision, but "WHAT do you love about someone who places such firm limits on his relaionships. If he sees love as something to be a victim of, he won't risk loving ; while cheerfully making you a victim of love with him, and perhaps feeling this is proving his point ?
Frankly, what are you really likely to get out of continuing a relationship with this guy, other than disappointment and hurt, and distraction from better chances with someone else ?

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3
Our users say:
Posted by: Dug | 2011-07-13

He''s a insecure sympathy seeking arsehole. Dump him and his crap attitude. They are plenty people that will give it thier all in a relationship. Patience!!! There is no urgency to get married.

Reply to Dug
Posted by: Honestly Saying | 2011-07-13

Hi Kate.

What is there to love in a man who gives you nothing back? He has told you that he will never go all out in a relationship, so I must ask why he''s in it at all.......for the s3x? If so I think you should seriously reconsider your involvement with this man, unless of course you are willing to be his free ride.

Reply to Honestly Saying
Posted by: cybershrink | 2011-07-13

As so often in questions of this type, I must ask, not "why do you love him ", as that is not a rational and planned decision, but "WHAT do you love about someone who places such firm limits on his relaionships. If he sees love as something to be a victim of, he won't risk loving ; while cheerfully making you a victim of love with him, and perhaps feeling this is proving his point ?
Frankly, what are you really likely to get out of continuing a relationship with this guy, other than disappointment and hurt, and distraction from better chances with someone else ?

Reply to cybershrink

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