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Question
Posted by: Den | 2010/02/16

I think I' m going crazy

There is probably a medical term for this condition I think I might be suffering from. i will tell you some of the symptoms then maybe you have advice for me.

I get Extremely angry when someone takes my stuff and doesn' t replace it, or not give it back at all. For example when my son uses my hairbrush and doesn' t put it where he found it. I have a place for everyting and everything is in it' s place, and beware the one who moves my stuff!! i know it sounds like petty stuff, but i get so angry and can' t help myself, to such a point that i actually irritate myself!

I don' t like my children to sit on my bed when their feet are dirty, or touch me if their hands are dirty, after playing with the dogs for example. i flip out when they mess on my stuff or damage or break my stuff, or take something without asking.

Am i just a perfectionist, or a control freak or just full of nonsense? i really need to be able to live in the same house as myself (ha ha). is this a condition, because it really consumes a lot of my energy.

do you have any advice for me, please im desperate!

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

Sounds like a obsessive personality, perhaps ? Even a degree of Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder - in which one's own personal view of order and how things MUST be, grows out of proportion, and causes one to feel disturbed when things are not done or placed "right". It's a matter of degree, of getting it into proportion, of finding a more comfortable place for everyone, somewhere between utter rigidity and utter chaos.

CBT can help a good deal, possibly, if it is severe enough, some meds as well.

The information provided does not constitute a diagnosis of your condition. You should consult a medical practitioner or other appropriate health care professional for a physical exmanication, diagnosis and formal advice. Health24 and the expert accept no responsibility or liability for any damage or personal harm you may suffer resulting from making use of this content.

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Our users say:
Posted by: qwerty | 2010/02/17

I don' t agree with you, Soul. Certainly for some things it' s completely within your control to change your attitude and outlook on life, but something like OCD is a COMPULSION that you can' t just wish away! It' s something you have to unlearn, and that takes time and effort and (as CS said) potentially medication.
This is akin to saying to a new mom suffering from postnatal depression that she must just " cheer up"  and be happy about the new baby and stop being so negative! Not everything can be solved by a good attitude. Sometimes you need help.

Hang in there, Den!! I hope you find the support and help you need to get better.

Reply to qwerty
Posted by: Soul | 2010/02/16

Start with your attitude, is it necessary for you to be so angry no learn to control your temper.
Is it necessary for you to flip when your kids want to touch you.

Stop thinking of yourself and start to see yourself through your childrens eyes, can' t touch you cause you flip, can' t sit with you cause you flip and for what material stuff.
Your earlthy possesions and their places mean more to you than your kids having a smiling and calm parent.

I' m surprised you even allow them in the house.
It' s state of mind change it, it' s your choice you control it not it you.

Reply to Soul
Posted by: Den | 2010/02/16

okay Soul, if it is so easy, where do i start?

Reply to Den
Posted by: Soul | 2010/02/16

Sorry Sam but you are wrong, it' s as easy or as hard as you want it to be.

Reply to Soul
Posted by: Den | 2010/02/16

can someone help me out with " CBT"  as Cybershrink mentioned/? it must be some kind of therapy? and where can i find out more about it, i' n not too fond of any form of medication. Thanks Sam for understanding, it does sound easier said than done. you know, i even end up locking my bedroom when i' m not home so no one can touch my " Stuff" ! crazy hey?

Reply to Den
Posted by: Sam | 2010/02/16

Hi Den.

I think a lot of people are like Soul, and don' t understand OCD, just like most people don' t understand phobias. They think it' s as easy as telling yourself " no, don' t worry about the dirty bed sheets, I' ll get it later"  or " the spider is smaller than you, there is nothing to worry about" . It' s just not that simple. If this problem is getting in the way of your family relationships, then I think it would be good for you to see a doctor, so that you can get some meds, they help with the obsessions.

Reply to Sam
Posted by: Soul | 2010/02/16

You should consider putting this much effort and attention into your children as you do in your hang ups. So what if they mess up the bed covers so what if they mess on it and move it around it' s only stuff these things you can and will replace in your life time. The relationship with your children is so much more important than your possesions.

Lighten up relax and live your life not everything has to be perfect and be in it' s place. Haven' t you noticed how big your kids are getting, the bigger they get the less of their time you' ll have time you' ll never be able to recover because you are too preoccupied with things and their places.

Reply to Soul
Posted by: cybershrink | 2010/02/16

Sounds like a obsessive personality, perhaps ? Even a degree of Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder - in which one's own personal view of order and how things MUST be, grows out of proportion, and causes one to feel disturbed when things are not done or placed "right". It's a matter of degree, of getting it into proportion, of finding a more comfortable place for everyone, somewhere between utter rigidity and utter chaos.

CBT can help a good deal, possibly, if it is severe enough, some meds as well.

Reply to cybershrink

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