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Question
Posted by: zeetah | 2011/03/01

i need some advice desperately

At the moment I feel like im in this bubble but am to scared to get out of it and to live my life to the fullest.

And when I was at school I had to deal with bullies that said they my friends yet they made fun of me behind my back.

I blocked out most of my past, I think cause I had such a rough, if I can put it that way, past

But it is not helping me at the moment.

Im to scared to do new things, to try new things and I just feel there is much more that mite have happened

In my past that I blocked out and haven’ t dealt with the problem that’ s why I am having this problem I have now

And it is really putting strain on my relationship with my boyfriend. I am a single mother of an 7 year old daughter and I don’ t want here to adapt my insecurities if I can put it that way, I don’ t want her to think that the life im living is the right way. (if I can put it that way) I struggle to make friends, I don’ t have friends of my own, the friends I do have is actually my boyfriend’ s friends and I do sometimes get depressed if he goes with out them and I don’ t have friends I can go out with.

Cant stand up to my parents at home( for a almost 30 yr old woman, I don’ t think that is right, cause they can say what they want and im just to scared to stand up for myself and say what I also feel)

I tend to just go with flow, to scared to make my own decisions, to scared to talk to people cause I just wanna be perfect and don’ t wanna say something wrong and im scared they gonna laugh at me.

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

OK, none of us i perfect, and i we all waited until we could say something perfect, there'd be total silence around the world. What you describe is a perfect situation in which proper sensible counselling can help so much, especially if of the Cognitive-BehaviournTherapy format , CBT, to identify, test and change the maladaptive and unhelpful set of assumptions you have made about life.

The information provided does not constitute a diagnosis of your condition. You should consult a medical practitioner or other appropriate health care professional for a physical exmanication, diagnosis and formal advice. Health24 and the expert accept no responsibility or liability for any damage or personal harm you may suffer resulting from making use of this content.

3
Our users say:
Posted by: FUn& Games | 2011/03/01

Get laid.

REPEATEDLY!

SLEEP AROUND!!

DO COCAINE!!!

THEN GET A BOYFRIEND WITH A SERIOUS ATTITUDE PROBLEM!

Or read the bible, join a church marry a paster fcuk what can any sane person say in response to your post?! My heart goes out to you? All the best? Would you like a card?

Hopefully things will get better for you, I hope that and if you hope that then theres 2 people hoping for something better.
If it doesnt work out reference check the holocaust, it could be worse.

Reply to FUn&amp Games
Posted by: Lolo | 2011/03/01

Here are seven tips to help you rebuild your self-esteem:

1. Surround yourself with positive people: Negative people drag you down, positive people motivate others. So take a look at the people in your life - are they positive? If they are not positive people, I recommend limiting or eliminating your association. Seek out positive people.

2. Take Risks: Step outside your comfort zone. Once you realize that you can succeed at whatever you try, you will start to develop self-confidence. If you can’ t do it alone, find a support buddy, and ask them to help you remain accountable for your actions.

3. Keep an Acknowledgement Journal: Acknowledge your self-worth by recognizing your accomplishments in writing.

4. Make a commitment to change: You can choose to feel motivated ,or you can choose to feel discouraged about yourself and your life. What do you choose? Make the commitment to change your thinking today. Start appreciating what is right in the world, and in your life, and change the things that you don’ t like or don’ t want - stop being the victim and start taking action.

5. Change your Negative Self Talk: You know that voice in your head that tells you that you screwed up, that you’ re not good enough or you’ re stupid? Start telling that voice to shut up. I challenge you to pay close attention to what you are telling yourself  if it is negative, find a way to turn it around. You learned how to talk negatively to yourself, so teach yourself to talk positively. Believe it or not it is a choice.

6. Ask for support: If you find that you just can’ t make these changes on your own, but are committed to change, then ask others for support. Find a coach, minister or support group to help you learn to appreciate yourself for all your greatness, and leave that negative self-esteem behind.

7. Take Action: Get involved in a physical fitness program. Physical activity is a great way to feel better both physically and emotionally. Make the commitment to stay in motion today, and before you know it, you will see your self-esteem skyrocket, and you may even be able to fit into your skinny jeans again- who knows? Wouldn’ t hurt to find out now, would it?

Reply to Lolo
Posted by: cybershrink | 2011/03/01

OK, none of us i perfect, and i we all waited until we could say something perfect, there'd be total silence around the world. What you describe is a perfect situation in which proper sensible counselling can help so much, especially if of the Cognitive-BehaviournTherapy format , CBT, to identify, test and change the maladaptive and unhelpful set of assumptions you have made about life.

Reply to cybershrink

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