Our expert says:
Is her recent behaviour actually untrue to her inner and eternal self ( unlikely ) or shaped by disorder, or just signs of her growth and development, maybe in ways you didn't expect or anticipate ? Why do you feel that studying or doing private work is "not her" ? Presumably it's fulfilling for her ? Maybe these are things she has long wanted to be able to do, but was unable to tackle before now ?
Not making love for an extended period and the affair, does indeed suggest that the relationship is not goping well ( and maybe she has looked in these more intellectual areas, for more satisfaction ) - but marriage counselling can always help improve mutual understanding and content. Your comments sound as though you have planned a future that either doesn't include her, o at least has not included her in the planning. Why is this ? Does she know how much you feel that you miss her ?
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