advertisement
Question
Posted by: karin | 2012-05-12

I had it with my husband!

I always thougt we were happily maried, but I am finish belittleling myself to beg my husband for intimacy! We are married 19 year, still have 2 small children.....my husband just says he is tired, stressed and don''t feel good about himself anymore! He says he is old now, he is 46! I am good looking and very supportive of him! He cares a lot and spoils me and give me attention, but intimacy only once a month, maybe! I want to feel loved and excepted and beautiful! I am withdrawing myself now! I give up! No more! No more making a fool of myself to put me in such a vulnarable spot! I am so depressed about all this! Withdrawing myself and poor self esteem! He doesn''t have time for councelling and is to private.....

Not what you were looking for? Try searching again, or ask your own question
Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

So he is loving, but relatively asexual. It's not your fault, and I'm sure he doesn't wish to be disappointing or troubling you, either. I'm sure he is highly embarrassed by all this, and reluctant to talk about it,but I think he ( and thus you ) would really benefit if he saw a good local shrink for an assessment, as he could very well be suffering fromDepression and/or anxiety, both of which have a negative impact on sexual desire and performance, and he may fear he'd only fail if he tried so he's reluctant to try.
Psychological counselling of the form known as CBT ( Cognitive-Behaviour Therapy ) is really effective in helping both anxiety and depression, and is the doc suggests meds, it'd be worth trying one of the more recent Antidepressants, Valdoxan ( agomelatine ) because it doesn't cause sexual side-effects as many of the others do. While they may also even if for a time, reduce sexual desire and performance, Valdoxan does not do this.

The information provided does not constitute a diagnosis of your condition. You should consult a medical practitioner or other appropriate health care professional for a physical exmanication, diagnosis and formal advice. Health24 and the expert accept no responsibility or liability for any damage or personal harm you may suffer resulting from making use of this content.

3
Our users say:
Posted by: Maria | 2012-05-13

What is your lifestyle like as a family? Do you eat healthy meals, play with your kids, exercise? Maybe if you focus on improving your husband''s mental and physical health the intimacy issues with get better automatically.

Reply to Maria
Posted by: Maria | 2012-05-13

Has he been for a thorough physical checkup? There could be other health reasons for his lack of desire, in addition to stress. Don''t necessarily assume that lack of intimacy means he doesn''t love or accept you, or think that you''re beautiful. Perhaps you should go to counselling on your own to help you put this into perspective. If your self esteem relies on your husband making love to you then you have some issues of your own to deal with.

Reply to Maria
Posted by: cybershrink | 2012-05-13

So he is loving, but relatively asexual. It's not your fault, and I'm sure he doesn't wish to be disappointing or troubling you, either. I'm sure he is highly embarrassed by all this, and reluctant to talk about it,but I think he ( and thus you ) would really benefit if he saw a good local shrink for an assessment, as he could very well be suffering fromDepression and/or anxiety, both of which have a negative impact on sexual desire and performance, and he may fear he'd only fail if he tried so he's reluctant to try.
Psychological counselling of the form known as CBT ( Cognitive-Behaviour Therapy ) is really effective in helping both anxiety and depression, and is the doc suggests meds, it'd be worth trying one of the more recent Antidepressants, Valdoxan ( agomelatine ) because it doesn't cause sexual side-effects as many of the others do. While they may also even if for a time, reduce sexual desire and performance, Valdoxan does not do this.

Reply to cybershrink

Have your say

Thanks for commenting! Your comment will appear on the site shortly.
Thanks for commenting! Your comment will appear on the site shortly.
advertisement