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Question
Posted by: Bud | 2009/10/19

I found piece!!!

Hi doc, after years of writing here and complaining about my wife not willing to be intemite with me and lots of crying I have now found piece and have berried my sexlife with my wife. It is now over, the beging the going to extra ordenary lengths to please here. It is now gone and the piece I have after desiding to go wiith out it rather that the above. I actually feel free. Thanks for all the advice and help, God bless.

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

I'm pleased to hear you've found a way of feeling more peaceful. But I wonder whether this is the best way. When we are in a situation that is impossible to change, it can be wise to accept it, so that our resistance to something that won't change, doesn't become the source of all our discomfort. But if your wife refuses to be intimate, this is not normal, and she needs to see a shrink / counsellor to work on that. It is not fair for her to refuse to do so, or to refuse to see a relationship counsellor with you, because she knows that her refusal is not natural and not at all fair to you. If she flatly refuses to deal with this, maybe you should see a counsellor, to maintain your cool, but to explore the option of leaving her and making a happier life for yourself

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Our users say:
Posted by: Really | 2009/10/19

You must be crazy.... are you saying that you are going to live the rest of your life without sex???? I am damned if I can survive your life....

Maybe you need out... it is really worth it that you have to give up something that you enjoy doing just because your partner does not enjoy it? I think it is important to findout, is it you or is it the sex she does not want to give into... something is seriously wrong here....

If you can handle it and still live with it, then well done!

All the best!

Reply to Really
Posted by: almost mad | 2009/10/19

What exactly is the reason your wife no longer want to be intermate? Have you gone for couceling? While i am glad you have found peace, I wonder if there are underlying issues that can still be dealt with and resolved.

Reply to almost mad
Posted by: cybershrink | 2009/10/19

I'm pleased to hear you've found a way of feeling more peaceful. But I wonder whether this is the best way. When we are in a situation that is impossible to change, it can be wise to accept it, so that our resistance to something that won't change, doesn't become the source of all our discomfort. But if your wife refuses to be intimate, this is not normal, and she needs to see a shrink / counsellor to work on that. It is not fair for her to refuse to do so, or to refuse to see a relationship counsellor with you, because she knows that her refusal is not natural and not at all fair to you. If she flatly refuses to deal with this, maybe you should see a counsellor, to maintain your cool, but to explore the option of leaving her and making a happier life for yourself

Reply to cybershrink

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