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Question
Posted by: Beyond Tired | 2011-10-17

I am so stupid

Hi CS,
I know I am going to be criticized but that is life, I just cannot understand how come I keep doing the same thing over and over again, it is as if I cannot break the cycle, I can see it coming and still go straight ahead with it, good advice from all and all. Where I was warned by some others said I was the one that was wrong, that I had wronged the man who wants to be in my life, he is a good man who cares tremendously about me and wants to protect and love me and can take care of me financially as well and he will be good for the kids, etc. etc.

Well for the past two weeks I haven''t stopped to not drink something at night and with my tablets it is a knock out facility, he has also not left me alone. I have moved, he was the only person willing to assist, with a bakkie, my family said no ways, not again, I have too many books and things, so I had to ask him.

He has been good to me in many respects, he has helped me with the move, ensured I eat (I think he wants to keep me fat). I have been exhausted because of the drinking, pranged my car, he will help financially to get it fixed, help pay the excess as I was the responsible person for the accident. The electricity bill when I moved was a shocker, okay he didn''t help with this, but did pay the deposit for the new places electricity, so yeah he helps, but there was a ulterior motive and he got what he wanted, he confuses me so much sometimes that I don''t know what to say, do or think. I just want to switch off and be a zombie.

I know I have a mistake, this is the story of my life, but my family think he is a hero, he is such a wonderful man, he is so gentle and kind, so giving, he is a gentle giant. Even my best friend who met him for the first time thinks he is wonderful, he loves me so much she said''s and looks capable enough to take care of me. Maybe I am just full of nonsense and should be happy their is someone that loves me the way I am.

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

You're not stupid - that's one of the reasons other people get cross when you repeat obvious mistakes. You haven't broken this lousy cyctme, but stop telling yourself you CANNOT stop it. You haven't yet.
He must be confused, though, at how you blow hot and cold, rejecting him, then asking him to help move your books. But while you are still drinking, your meds won't work nor will much else. Being a zombie, by drugs or alcohol, is not solution - it merely enables the problems to increase.
Remind me - if he is as marvellous as the family says, so kind, gentle and generous - why was it you have ever broken up with him ?

The information provided does not constitute a diagnosis of your condition. You should consult a medical practitioner or other appropriate health care professional for a physical exmanication, diagnosis and formal advice. Health24 and the expert accept no responsibility or liability for any damage or personal harm you may suffer resulting from making use of this content.

2
Our users say:
Posted by: Beyond Belief!!!!!!!!! | 2011-10-17

As said by CS in your last post ,565 dated 14 sept this year, if you continue to have this man in your life l see there is nothing more to talk about............

We can offer no comfort here unless you help yourself.

However congratulations on your realization that you are extremely stupid! Last time it was suggested you changed your name to Beyond Help, perhaps you should consider the title Beyond Stupid?

Reply to Beyond Belief!!!!!!!!!
Posted by: cybershrink | 2011-10-17

You're not stupid - that's one of the reasons other people get cross when you repeat obvious mistakes. You haven't broken this lousy cyctme, but stop telling yourself you CANNOT stop it. You haven't yet.
He must be confused, though, at how you blow hot and cold, rejecting him, then asking him to help move your books. But while you are still drinking, your meds won't work nor will much else. Being a zombie, by drugs or alcohol, is not solution - it merely enables the problems to increase.
Remind me - if he is as marvellous as the family says, so kind, gentle and generous - why was it you have ever broken up with him ?

Reply to cybershrink

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