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Question
Posted by: Vanessa | 2010/09/08

Husbands disgusting habits!

My husband is 42 and has recently started these disgusting habits, when he comes home from work does not wash his hand when called to eat, when he uses the toilet and its a number 2 he does not wash his hands, picks his nose and eats it, picks on his blackheads and eats it, urinates in his bath water, burps out loud and the list goes on and on.

I have spoken to him on several occassions and have told him not to and that its totally digusting for a man of his age to do such things. He just laughs it off.

Please help! What can I do about it or must I just ignore it, its really sickening.

Thanks
Vanessa

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

What's curious about your story ( some people are always grubby ) is that you say he has RECENTLY started these ugly habits. Has anything else in hi life or work changed recently ? Otherwise, one wonders "why now ? " Sounds almost like a Second Childhood, and he seems to have become an oafish teenager at an advanced age.
Has he begun drinking excessively ? Or using drugs ? Is there a family history of odd behaviour in mid-life ?
As a response one could try being clear ( not confrontative, because that usually doesn't help ) and set out rules - if he hasn't washed properly, you don't serve food. If he burps or otherwise misbehaves at the table, further food is withheld. Until it is certain he does not lazily urinate in the bath-water, it will be HIS task to wash out the bath after he has used it.

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7
Our users say:
Posted by: Woman | 2010/09/08

Terrible manners! There are two things you can do:
1) embarrass him in front of the kids/ his friends/ family by telling them how disgusting he is.
2) employ a maid full-time and have HIM pay for her. If he bitches about it, tell him that you are certainly not going to perpetuate or accept his bad habits, and he''ll just have to own up and take responsibility.

Reply to Woman
Posted by: Vanessa | 2010/09/08

Hi he doesnt drink, smoke or do drugs at all. Doesnt even go out alone or have friends. His family is very neat and tidy and have manners, I really dont know where this comes from. He never washes out a bath, throws his clothes on the floor next to the wash basket, never helps around the house, pees on the toilets seat etc. I cannot degrade myself and do as suggested like not wash my hand or pee in the bath. He is also very stubborn. Oh yes and he has also in the past not brushed his teeth for a week that i did not even kiss him hello or goodbye and slept with my back towards him. It really seems to be that some men go through there second childhood when they reach there 40''s. His quick to mention how disgusting one of his clients were when he had to go do a electrical fitting in her house that her dirty pads, panties etc were lying around in her bedroom where he had to go fit a plug, why cant he see that he is also disgusting with these bad habits!

Reply to Vanessa
Posted by: understanding | 2010/09/08

Yip! i know exactly what it is like. My hubby tese days are not so hubby anymore, more like slubby. Fat lazy sloth who makes as far as he goes &  never cleans up. He hasn''t cleaned his toilet for almost 8 weeks now &  I just plainly refuse to do it. And this is a man with a reputable job???

Reply to understanding
Posted by: Scarlet | 2010/09/08

Venessa, your''e not alone. I have this problem with my father. When we were young, he use to drill us on etiket and whatnot. Now he drinks, smokes like a chymney. He farts infront of anyone and everywhere. He does this snort thing, you know some men do this, and then spit it out. He spills on the toilet seat when he pees, he chews food mouth wide open, while talking also. He''ll cough from the sigarettes, and while couching he''ll want to continue his conversation instead of finishing couching firts. He''s really got some baaaad habits as well, and it grosses me out. When he comes to visit, I''m alreay de bl!ksem in, cos I know how he is. It''s a difficult thing, you''ve got all my sympathy.

Reply to Scarlet
Posted by: Pig | 2010/09/08

that is really discusting, he doesn''t have any manners, maybe you should also pee in his water and make food only for him without washing your hands, you should not even bath or brush teeth and see how he acts then. Unfortunately maybe someone told him to be a pig or he was born a pig and only now the real pig comes forward.... sis pity on you that you must go through this pathetic behaviour from the pigs side.

Reply to Pig
Posted by: two-stone | 2010/09/08

You have to lose it - scream at him and tell him if he does not stop, you are out of there. He is disgusting, don''t know how you put up with the pig.

Reply to two-stone
Posted by: cybershrink | 2010/09/08

What's curious about your story ( some people are always grubby ) is that you say he has RECENTLY started these ugly habits. Has anything else in hi life or work changed recently ? Otherwise, one wonders "why now ? " Sounds almost like a Second Childhood, and he seems to have become an oafish teenager at an advanced age.
Has he begun drinking excessively ? Or using drugs ? Is there a family history of odd behaviour in mid-life ?
As a response one could try being clear ( not confrontative, because that usually doesn't help ) and set out rules - if he hasn't washed properly, you don't serve food. If he burps or otherwise misbehaves at the table, further food is withheld. Until it is certain he does not lazily urinate in the bath-water, it will be HIS task to wash out the bath after he has used it.

Reply to cybershrink

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